Colds and Flus

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:01:35 Hello and welcome to The Luxury Podcast. My name's Jonathan Vernon-Smith, and with me is William Hanson. This is the podcast that helps you live a more luxury life.

William Hanson 0:01:56 Hello, Jonathan and I are here to help you create the everyday moments of luxury that make life worth living. Whatever your budget.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:02:01 In each episode of The Luxury Podcast, William and I tackle an area of life that we think you really should upgrade, sorting the Onslows from the Hyacinths, advising the nation in gracious living. So, William, what topical subject are we going to discuss today?

William Hanson 0:02:17 We're going to be talking about the common cold and flu.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:02:21 Very common. Common as muck.

William Hanson 0:02:24 Yes, who'd have it?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:02:26 Common colds and flu, and it's very much that season.

William Hanson 0:02:29 It is. Well, I'm lucky to be here because, as I said to you when we started— before we started recording today, on Monday— well, Sunday and Monday, I was not very well.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:02:39 This was after my luxury soiree. It was nothing to do with my soiree, was it?

William Hanson 0:02:42 Well, I did actually originally think it would be, but then when it carried— no, no, because, you know—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:02:47 Did you think I'd poisoned you?

William Hanson 0:02:48 No, because we, you know, we had a lot to eat and drink.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:02:52 Yes.

William Hanson 0:02:52 So, on Sunday, when I felt a bit, oof, I thought, well, fair enough. It was a heavy night.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:02:57 Right. And then it lingered.

William Hanson 0:02:59 And then it lingered, and I had to cancel all my work on Monday.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:03 Oh, William, I've just realised.

William Hanson 0:03:06 What?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:06 You had your first 2-day hangover. It happens increasingly as you get older.

William Hanson 0:03:12 I don't think it was a 2-day hangover.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:14 You had a 2-day hangover.

William Hanson 0:03:16 Jonathan, it was an executive fatigue illness. It wasn't a cold, and it wasn't The flu.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:21 Executive fatigue.

William Hanson 0:03:23 Mm.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:24 Right.

William Hanson 0:03:24 EF. I had that.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:26 That sounds distinctly like when we were in Frigg.

William Hanson 0:03:29 And

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:30 my father's lady friend, who used to be an NHS nurse, diagnosed you as having had some kind of mini-stroke because you fainted sitting down on a plane.

William Hanson 0:03:39 We have not talked about this, but yes, she did not— it was not a— look, she said I had a transient ischaemic attack. I have also written down here from that night, mini stroke.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:55 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:03:55 That is potentially why I fainted.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:57 A TIA. You

William Hanson 0:03:58 had a TIA? I had a TIA.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:03:59 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:03:59 A transient ischaemic attack.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:04:02 And of course, the minute that was mentioned, you latched onto that. You were taking notes.

William Hanson 0:04:07 She was taking me seriously.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:04:08 She's the only one that's ever taken you seriously. You're the only person in the world who's ever fainted sitting down.

William Hanson 0:04:13 No! My father's fainted sitting down. I fainted sitting down. It's a thing.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:04:19 Yeah, and you all had TIAs, did you?

William Hanson 0:04:21 Well, I don't know about my father, I think I had a little mini stroke.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:04:24 Right. You didn't have a mini stroke.

William Hanson 0:04:27 I was flying premium economy. It was bound to happen.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:04:30 It brought a stroke on. You should say that at the check-in desk. If you ever go economy, I must warn you, last time I was made to fly premium economy, I had a mini stroke.

William Hanson 0:04:43 I had a transient ischemic attack.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:04:46 I mean, if you were to upgrade me to business class, it would obviously reduce the risk significantly. You could try that one.

William Hanson 0:04:52 Anyway, so I didn't have that on Monday. I just was so fatigued. I had to— I was sleeping all throughout the day. Now, that is not a hangover.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:05:00 No, but that doesn't sound like a cold or flu either.

William Hanson 0:05:03 No, but it's sort of— it's a malady, and it's— that's what we're talking about today.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:05:06 Was that your only symptom?

William Hanson 0:05:08 Yeah, so I wasn't— I wasn't snotty. Well, more than usual.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:05:12 Right.

William Hanson 0:05:13 Didn't have any phlegm. None of that. I wasn't bunged up. I didn't have a headache.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:05:21 Right. A sore throat?

William Hanson 0:05:23 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:05:24 Well, you didn't have a cold or a flu.

William Hanson 0:05:26 Not at the start of the day.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:05:33 But— You— You made use of it, did you?

William Hanson 0:05:43 Yeah. No, it was— It was odd because I— had you forced me, had Sadie forced me to come in to work— we weren't working, we weren't doing this— I could probably have done it. But I was sort of meant to be going to do some social media, and I—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:05:59 Hang on a minute. Hang on. So—

William Hanson 0:06:02 No, but you know when you're ill, but you— I don't think I would present as ill. It's not like I'm streaming and blowing my nose and coughing and spluttering.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:06:09 You were— I can diagnose that.

William Hanson 0:06:12 Mm-hmm.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:06:12 You were tired. Oh my God. You literally had a day being tired.

William Hanson 0:06:19 I've never felt like that before.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:06:21 Well, yeah, but you're getting on a bit now. How old are you now? 29. You're catching me up. I'm afraid that kind of thing is going to get worse. You might have to start having an afternoon nap. You're but months away from an afternoon nap. I can see it.

William Hanson 0:06:36 I don't have the lifestyle to have an afternoon nap.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:06:38 Well, that's the thing. You're burning the candle, aren't you, with your new luxury going out till 3 AM Excuse

William Hanson 0:06:44 me, that was at your house. We left at 11:15.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:06:46 Oh, you've given yourself a fatigue illness, haven't you?

William Hanson 0:06:50 Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:06:51 Oh. Well, you need to start taking it easier.

William Hanson 0:06:54 Okay.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:06:54 Because in all seriousness, coming back to our theme for today, when you're run down—

William Hanson 0:07:00 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:07:01 And it sounds like you might have been a bit run down, William.

William Hanson 0:07:03 Maybe.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:07:03 That's when you're very susceptible to a cold and a flu. And you go near a highly infectious, dirty person, They cough all over you. Next thing you know, you've woken up feeling dreadful.

William Hanson 0:07:14 True. Well, I don't know who I— I don't know if I— I mean, it could be someone on the Tube. I don't know. Who knows who I have gone— I haven't seen a friend that has been ill. I've had my COVID jab.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:07:24 Well done.

William Hanson 0:07:25 I need to have my flu jab. But in case I had sort of slight— I don't know if it was— it wasn't flu, really, was it? Because, you know, when you get—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:07:32 No, it wasn't flu, William. You were tired. It wasn't flu. You'd know if you had flu. Flu doesn't make you tired for a day in bed. That's called being tired.

William Hanson 0:07:47 But you know when you have your COVID jab, they say, have you had COVID or COVID symptoms in the last 2 weeks? 'Cause presumably if you have, they can't inject you. I'd imagine it's the same thing for the flu. If you've had flu or flu-like symptoms in the last 2 weeks, they can't inject you.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:08:03 But you haven't had flu-like symptoms.

William Hanson 0:08:05 Well, I wondered if it was mild flu. If it was flu-lite. And because I took a couple of vitamin C tablets, I wonder if that had staved it off.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:08:21 Hang on a minute. So, let's just go over your symptoms. In fact, don't rely on me. Let's get the NHS up, shall we? For our international listeners, that's the National Health Service that has a very, very good website.

William Hanson 0:08:37 But I'm Boopa.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:08:40 Well, well, for this particular episode, you're not. You're going to slam it on the NHS. Right. NHS flu symptoms. Are you ready?

William Hanson 0:08:50 The current strain.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:08:53 What do you mean, the current strain?

William Hanson 0:08:56 Well, because, you know, illnesses, they might change each year.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:08:59 All right. So symptoms of flu. Let's see if we can diagnose you. Did you have a sudden high temperature, William?

William Hanson 0:09:06 I didn't take my temperature.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:07 Right. Did you feel shivery?

William Hanson 0:09:10 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:11 No. Did you feel very hot?

William Hanson 0:09:13 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:14 No. So, you didn't have a temperature. An aching body. I mean, anyone that's ever had flu, you're aching all over.

William Hanson 0:09:22 I mean, my shoulder blades were a little bit achy.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:24 Your shoulder blades?

William Hanson 0:09:26 You know, the top of my upper back. Well, they were.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:32 Right, okay.

William Hanson 0:09:34 But not like, oh.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:35 Your shoulder blades.

William Hanson 0:09:37 Yes, maybe. Don't say it. Why are you minimising my illness?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:41 Because I've never heard anyone say, oh, I had terrible flu last— my shoulder blades. Right. So, you weren't achy?

William Hanson 0:09:53 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:54 Feeling tired or exhausted?

William Hanson 0:09:56 Yes. There you go. You see, I've got the flu.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:09:59 A dry cough?

William Hanson 0:10:00 No, I don't think so.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:10:01 A sore throat?

William Hanson 0:10:03 Not for most

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:10:05 of the day. A headache?

William Hanson 0:10:08 No. I mean, I took— I preventatively took Tylenol.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:10:12 So, you didn't have a headache though?

William Hanson 0:10:16 No, could be the Tylenol.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:10:17 No. Difficulty sleeping? You are such a hypochondriac. I can see you trying to crowbar in these symptoms.

William Hanson 0:10:29 No, in fact, if anything, I fell to sleep. Quite quickly.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:10:31 You were quite tired. Yeah. Funny that. A loss of appetite.

William Hanson 0:10:35 Yes, actually, I didn't eat an awful lot. Do you know what, Mikey?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:10:40 I think I know why that was.

William Hanson 0:10:44 No. I was texting Mikey, who was downstairs. I was like, oh, I think I'll have a banana. And then I was like, oh no, do you know? I suddenly wanted porridge.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:10:58 Oh.

William Hanson 0:10:58 So he was gonna make me porridge, and then I texted him like, no, I can't face porridge. And then 10 minutes later, I can face porridge.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:04 Oh.

William Hanson 0:11:05 And then eventually, 45 minutes later, porridge was produced.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:09 Okay.

William Hanson 0:11:10 So I then had porridge.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:11 I don't— I think—

William Hanson 0:11:12 Was that it?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:13 That's it.

William Hanson 0:11:13 Oh.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:14 On the balance of probability, I don't think you had flu for 24 hours. I don't think you did.

William Hanson 0:11:20 Flu adjacent.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:22 Otherwise known as… Being tired.

William Hanson 0:11:26 Right. When was the last time you had a cold or flu?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:29 Well, do you know, it's funny you say that. So, I have often suffered with colds and flu over the winter.

William Hanson 0:11:36 Even though you have your jab?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:37 Well, that doesn't prevent against colds, does it?

William Hanson 0:11:40 No, but flu, it should do.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:11:41 Flu, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, I've offered— I've often suffered with it. And the problem that I have is when I get a cold, it goes to my vocal cords. And once it goes to my vocal cords, that's it. I just become a croaky mess. and I can't talk. And then I normally try and battle through it because I don't want to let work down.

William Hanson 0:12:01 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:12:02 And then I completely ruin my voice and become just, you know, useless. And then it takes about a week before my voice comes back. So that's a big problem. However—

William Hanson 0:12:12 Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:12:13 Just over a year ago—

William Hanson 0:12:15 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:12:15 I started on a new regime, and I don't want to jinx it, But ever since I started on my new regime, I have not had to take a single day off ill because of cold and flu.

William Hanson 0:12:29 What's your regime?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:12:30 Sambucol. I have a—

William Hanson 0:12:34 You have a sambuca?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:12:35 I have a Sambucol tablet every morning, right, which contains some kind of berries for your immune system. And I have a maximum strength echinacea, and I do that every day. And my immune system feels as if it's much more robust.

William Hanson 0:12:52 Do you feel better?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:12:53 No, but, but when I have felt as if I'm coming down with something, it's almost as if I feel a bit turbocharged and my immune system seems to fight it off quite quickly. Okay. So it doesn't develop into something.

William Hanson 0:13:08 And which reputable health practitioner do you get your maximum strength echinacea from?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:13:15 Amazon. But you could— I used to get it from Morrison's.

William Hanson 0:13:18 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:13:18 But no, you can get it from Amazon. But—

William Hanson 0:13:21 And your sambucol?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:13:23 Oh yeah. No, sorry, I got it around the wrong way. No, my sambucol is from Amazon.

William Hanson 0:13:27 Right.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:13:28 My echinacea's from Superdrug.

William Hanson 0:13:29 Okay. Yeah, fine. Okay, I'm going to go and get that.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:13:32 Try it. Yeah.

William Hanson 0:13:34 Particularly as we head into Titanic and Luxury Life.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:13:37 Yeah. Well, I mean, it's famous last words, isn't it? 'Cause I'm probably now gonna get a stinker of a cold. But it has so far kept me— That would be quite funny on stage.

William Hanson 0:13:45 if you're sniffling away. How's your sambuca

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:13:48 going? Well, don't— no, because that's the thing. We don't— no, we don't want that. And that's why I've had my COVID jab and my flu jab. Did you see when we mentioned that on the podcast the other day? Did you see we had some criticism?

William Hanson 0:14:03 What?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:04 They're all still out there, you know, all that lot.

William Hanson 0:14:06 Right.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:07 I'm never listening to your podcast again, you—

William Hanson 0:14:11 They comment on that.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:11 You on Spotify.

William Hanson 0:14:12 Oh, I don't read those.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:13 You mentioned having had the— I mean, it's up to us.

William Hanson 0:14:17 Yes, thank you very much.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:18 Yeah, if we want to have a blooming jab, we'll have a jab. If you don't, don't. You get it, we won't. End of story.

William Hanson 0:14:23 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:24 You know,

William Hanson 0:14:25 our body's our choice.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:26 Exactly. And the reason we did that was because we don't want to be ill in the run-up to Christmas.

William Hanson 0:14:31 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:31 And the— do you know the worst time to have a bad cold?

William Hanson 0:14:35 Is there a good time to have a good cold— a bad cold?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:37 Well, there's not really a good time. But the worst time, and I've had it over Christmas. Oh, have you ever been ill over Christmas?

William Hanson 0:14:44 Not for a while.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:14:45 I remember years ago, I had all of the family. I was hosting Christmas Day, and I had all of the family coming. And I'd— and I woke up on Christmas Eve feeling like death. All of those symptoms: shivery, terrible sore throat, banging headache. Felt absolutely dreadful. And I thought to myself, Come on, pull yourselves together. You know, it's not going to kill you. You've got Christmas Day to do.

William Hanson 0:15:16 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:15:16 So I kind of battled on during Christmas Eve, and then of course woke up on Christmas Day, felt absolutely dreadful. And I was standing in the kitchen trying to cook this turkey, and I was shaking. I'd got a duvet wrapped around me because I was shaking. It was so awful. It was terrible. And I kind of served them up. I mean, why they ate it. I mean, can you imagine? It was probably dripping with flu.

William Hanson 0:15:43 Ugh.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:15:43 And they— and I served them their lunch, and then I went to bed. I said, I can't, I can't sit here. So I went to bed. It was just dreadful.

William Hanson 0:15:50 And are you a good patient?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:15:51 No.

William Hanson 0:15:52 No. Sort of knew the answer to that.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:15:55 No, I'm not. Well, you know me, I'm, I'm quite grumpy. I'm a grumpy person, aren't I?

William Hanson 0:16:00 Are you?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:00 What do you mean, are I? Oh, shut up, you tart. So I'm, I'm quite grumpy when I'm ill.

William Hanson 0:16:07 You're even grumpier.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:08 I am off-the-scale grumpy. I'm so snappy. I snap at everyone around me. I, uh, I, I, yeah, I really become very unpleasant when I'm ill. I'm not a good patient at all. I hate being ill, and I take it out on everyone around me.

William Hanson 0:16:23 Right.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:24 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:16:24 Okay.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:25 Are you good?

William Hanson 0:16:25 Yes, I think I'm quite good.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:26 You're just pathetic, aren't you? Just lie there.

William Hanson 0:16:28 But I'm, I'm, I'm placid.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:31 Placid?

William Hanson 0:16:32 Yes. I'm a placid patient.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:34 You're the patient that everyone feels sorry for.

William Hanson 0:16:36 Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:37 Oh, bless him. Whereas I'm the one they're like, oh, leave him. Leave him. Don't bother.

William Hanson 0:16:43 Yeah. No, I'm just sort of— and I will still try and do as much. I mean, I went downstairs and washed some glasses and got told off. Like, get upstairs.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:51 Really?

William Hanson 0:16:52 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:53 Oh.

William Hanson 0:16:53 I felt the need to do something. I can't sit there.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:16:56 Oh.

William Hanson 0:16:57 I've watched a put my laptop in bed and watch The Crown.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:00 You see, that's not— that's the one positive, isn't it?

William Hanson 0:17:03 Yeah, but then it would be like, it would be nice to be doing this feeling a little bit better.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:06 Yeah, but I think sometimes, you know, having a day or so just watching some rubbish on TV and just relaxing, you know, it probably is good for you, isn't it?

William Hanson 0:17:16 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:17 It's good for you physically and mentally as well.

William Hanson 0:17:20 I think I should diarise that more.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:21 I think you should.

William Hanson 0:17:22 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:23 Of course, when you've got dogs, I mean, that's the other problem. When you're ill and you've got dogs.

William Hanson 0:17:29 Yeah, who looks after your dogs?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:30 Dogs do not care about you being ill.

William Hanson 0:17:32 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:32 So, I have had situations in the past where I've not had a friend to walk a dog, and I felt dreadful, and I thought, I've gotta go and walk the dog. And I've gone out with— this is when I had Poppy. And I've literally been in a field in the middle of nowhere, shivering, feeling dreadful, thinking, oh my God, I just need to be in bed.

William Hanson 0:17:53 But how selfless of you though.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:17:55 Well, you can't do anything else, can you, when you've got a dog?

William Hanson 0:17:57 Now, she's lucky to be here because she's recovering from a cold. Producer Sadie.

Speaker A 0:18:02 I've made an appearance.

William Hanson 0:18:04 You've made an appearance. Hello, welcome back to your own podcast. Thanks, boys. Yeah, we coped without you with Rodrigo, who did an excellent job.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:18:12 Didn't you, Rodrigo? Yes.

William Hanson 0:18:15 Are you a good patient or not?

Speaker F 0:18:19 I just— I get on with it. I'm not very good at relaxing. But I do feel sorry for myself, or I'll make a point of the fact I'm not complaining, which in itself is a slight complaint.

William Hanson 0:18:30 Right. Yes. And are you a good nurse? We know sometimes, in Jonathan's words, you dress as a kinky nurse when you come into work. That is true.

Speaker F 0:18:38 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:18:38 But are you a good nurse?

Speaker F 0:18:39 I'm good on the first day, and after that, people need to just get over it, I think. I don't like it. I don't like a whinger. That's my main thing.

William Hanson 0:18:47 No.

Speaker F 0:18:48 In life in general.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:18:48 See, I'm, I'm a good nurse, actually.

Speaker F 0:18:50 Are you?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:18:51 Yeah. If someone's genuinely ill, I'm very good. But what's the timeline

Speaker F 0:18:55 give them?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:18:55 Uh, it depends how ill they are. I mean, if you're properly ill, then I would be quite patient, and I'd make you a soup. You know, I'd make you—

William Hanson 0:19:05 From scratch?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:19:06 Yeah, from scratch. I'd go and buy fresh oranges, and I'd squeeze you fresh orange juice. I would— I'm that kind of person. I would do all of that for you if I knew you were genuinely ill. If you were tired, I would be maybe less sympathetic.

William Hanson 0:19:25 Right. Well, thank God we don't live together.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:19:27 Can you imagine?

William Hanson 0:19:29 And thank God we'll have Dougie and his team of professionals at Pond Court to look after us.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:19:33 Do you think— how would you be looking after me if— when I get snappy?

William Hanson 0:19:37 I think I'd— I'm a great nurse.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:19:38 Well, if I get snappy, because I'd be quite snappy with you.

William Hanson 0:19:41 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:19:42 And I'd probably shout at you.

William Hanson 0:19:44 Shout? I'd probably just spit in your soup.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:19:50 I'm the kind of, you know, I'd be in bed and I'd need something, and I'd shout, William! And then if you didn't come quite quickly— Why is it impossible to have a conversation with you?

William Hanson 0:20:19 I said nothing.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:20:20 If you didn't come quite quickly, I'd start banging on the wall and things like that. And then when you did come, when you finally arrived in the bedroom, I shouted. I'd say something like, where the hell have you been? Do you think you'd go well?

William Hanson 0:20:52 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:20:54 Honestly? When I'm not well, I'm a monster. I really am. I'm not good when I'm ill.

William Hanson 0:21:04 I was going back to my illness, if indeed it

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:21:08 was. Oh my god, yes. No, no. It was— do you know?

William Hanson 0:21:13 Where you— but you've said when you are feeling a bit— but you sort of, you forced yourself through and you can work.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:21:18 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:21:19 You then make yourself worse. It was just the sort of thing, it's like if I was doing something really important, doing this, Sex Ed, a client training, I could probably have done it. I don't think I would have been at my peak, but I could have done it. I was meant to be filming videos with Freddie on how to eat a mango. I decided that was not actually as important.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:21:39 No. Although the mango would've done you some good, probably.

William Hanson 0:21:42 Yes, ironically. Yes, I know. Which I mean, see. But we were meant to be driving for 2 and a half hours to get to where we were filming. So I was like, no, I'm not.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:21:50 No. So you—

William Hanson 0:21:52 Not feeling it.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:21:52 Had a day in bed?

William Hanson 0:21:54 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:21:54 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:21:55 Lovely.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:21:55 And did you wake up feeling— I mean, I love it when you feel better after being ill.

William Hanson 0:22:00 Yes, but then you're quite ginger when you wake up in the morning. You're like, do I feel better? Have— am I still sleepy? 'Cause I'd taken a sleeping tablet as well that night, 'cause I'd slept a lot during Monday. So I thought, am I actually going to sleep Monday night? spent a lot of the day sleeping, so I thought, take a pill. And I did, and it took me about half an hour, and I had some coffee, and I was like, oh no, I am— I think I'm okay.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:22:19 Do you ever have— if you're ill with a bad cold or flu, do you ever have one of those nuts nights?

William Hanson 0:22:26 I'm sorry?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:22:27 Nuts nights. Do you know what I mean?

William Hanson 0:22:29 A nuts night?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:22:30 Yeah, where you've got— you've got a fever, and you're in bed, and you've got weird dreams going on. You're imagining all kinds of things, and then you wake up sweating, and your brain is all over the place, and you think, gosh, I feel like I'm nuts. Do you never have that?

Speaker F 0:22:51 You sound nuts.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:22:54 Do you have— never had that?

Speaker F 0:22:55 No, I don't think

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:22:57 so. Oh, you lot have not been properly—

Speaker F 0:22:59 I have it where I can't get to sleep at the time.

William Hanson 0:23:00 What's in your echinacea tablets that you're taking? You sure they're echinacea?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:04 It's like a fever dream. Have you never had a fever dream?

William Hanson 0:23:07 No, no. I mean, I once dreamt that I was asked to carry the late Queen's handbag.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:10 What, when you were ill?

William Hanson 0:23:12 No, no, I was fine.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:16 It was just— It was just a random dream.

William Hanson 0:23:18 That's about as weird as it gets. And last night, my colleague Joe and I were on search for a Beanie Baby on Chiswick High Street.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:27 No! You've never had a fever dream?

William Hanson 0:23:33 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:33 Oh my word, you've not been properly ill.

William Hanson 0:23:37 I have been. I nearly died in hospital. That wasn't a cold or flu.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:40 And then you didn't have a fever dream?

William Hanson 0:23:42 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:42 I'm going to look up the symptoms of a fever dream, because I feel like you don't really understand what I'm talking about.

William Hanson 0:23:49 Not really. I mean, I've had dreams where I've woken up with a start, where, like, when you think you're falling or something like that.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:23:55 A fever dream is a type of dream that transpires during fever or febrile illness when the body experiences a significant elevation in body temperature beyond normal variation. These dreams are known for their bizarre or surreal experiences. While common in children, these dream occurrences can happen to people of any age. Fever dreams also significantly overlap with delirium and hallucinations.

William Hanson 0:24:23 Oh.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:24:23 Yeah. You've never had one?

William Hanson 0:24:25 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:24:27 Oh, wow. If I, if I'm properly ill, I have normally one night in the illness, I have a fever dream night.

William Hanson 0:24:33 Gosh.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:24:34 And it's all going on.

William Hanson 0:24:35 Well, I can't wait to have one now.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:24:37 No, no, it's not fun. No, it's awful. No, it's really—

William Hanson 0:24:40 What'd you dream about?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:24:41 Well, I couldn't really tell you now because it never makes any sense, but it's all very dark and very— it's all very strange.

William Hanson 0:24:49 Going back to colds,

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:24:50 I

William Hanson 0:24:51 mean, do you, when you go in your travels to America, When you're not surviving hurricanes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:24:55 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:24:56 Have you ever got or bought or stocked up on Mucinex?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:00 No.

William Hanson 0:25:01 Right. So, any of our Bucketheads in America, I'm sure you're aware of Mucinex.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:04 Rather aptly, while we're talking about this, my nose has started running.

William Hanson 0:25:08 Oh, and you've brought out a tissue, which was my next question. Are you a tissue or a handkerchief person?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:13 Tissue.

William Hanson 0:25:13 Okay.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:14 Tissue, tissue, we all fall down.

William Hanson 0:25:16 I think a handkerchief is much more executive.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:19 I think it's very unhygienic and disgusting.

William Hanson 0:25:21 Why?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:22 Because I just think when you blow your nose, you throw it away. You don't then put it back in your pocket with all those germs on it.

William Hanson 0:25:29 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:30 And then pull it out again.

William Hanson 0:25:31 I think the germs probably die.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:33 No, they don't. No, they're going to stay on there for quite a while.

William Hanson 0:25:37 Have we consulted Dr. Lisa on this?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:25:38 I think if you ask her, she would say, blow your nose, discard. Blow your nose, discard. Is that a— Yeah. Shutting your log in my bootstraps.

William Hanson 0:26:02 We have so many catchphrases on this podcast.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:26:07 Blow your nose to Scott. Oh dear.

William Hanson 0:26:12 Right, Mucinex.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:26:19 What is Mucinex?

William Hanson 0:26:20 It's amazing.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:26:21 Is it?

William Hanson 0:26:21 In fact, my brother was not feeling very well a few weeks ago, and he was over, and I said, right, James, you need to take Mucinex. Take these. And he took them, and they last 12 hours, and he called them weapons-grade effective. They were so good.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:26:35 Really?

William Hanson 0:26:35 They do a whole range of them. I'll send you a photo of them. All sorts. They do coughs, colds, flus. They're an expectorant, cough suppressor. They do all sorts of different ones. They have behind-the-counter ones, on-the-shelf ones. When I was actually not brilliantly well in Chicago when we were there, in August, and I was like, I know what it is, it's sort of flu-ish. Went and got my Mucinex from behind the counter. That was a drama because they said, could you provide ID? I did. They went, no, it needs to be American ID. I was like, I'm not sure it does, it's just to prove my age, and clearly I'm—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:27:10 British people are not made of strong enough stuff to take this stuff.

William Hanson 0:27:13 Yeah, and I said, I am really unwell, are you really not going to sell me these drugs? I actually think I might— I've said to this woman, have you heard of the Hippocratic Oath? Which I don't think they have in America. But I was like, come on, like, I'm clearly ill.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:27:24 What was that about, you're a nice patient, don't get stroppy?

William Hanson 0:27:28 I said it in a nice way.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:27:30 Have you heard of the Hippocratic Oath, you stupid woman?

William Hanson 0:27:33 And, uh, and she— and I said, what? Well, you can't sell— you can't sell medicine to non-Americans. But then, as I was saying, I was like, that's absolutely the sort of thing they would have in America. But she did eventually relent,

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:27:47 right,

William Hanson 0:27:48 and said it was at her discretion.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:27:49 Well, this sounds good stuff.

William Hanson 0:27:51 But no, Mucinex. I'm a great believer in it.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:27:54 What does it contain?

William Hanson 0:27:55 God knows.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:27:57 So you just took stuff you don't know what is in there?

William Hanson 0:27:59 They sell it in CVS.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:01 Oh.

William Hanson 0:28:01 It can't be that bad.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:03 No, I want it. Shall I look it up?

William Hanson 0:28:05 Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:05 I'm doing a lot of research during this episode.

William Hanson 0:28:08 There's Mucinex DM, there's Mucinex—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:10 How do you spell it? Mu—

William Hanson 0:28:11 Mu, M-U-C-I-N-E-X.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:14 C-I-N-E-X.

William Hanson 0:28:16 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:17 Mucinex. We have that.

William Hanson 0:28:20 What's that?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:22 It's got some—

William Hanson 0:28:23 Yeah, but probably not in that strength.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:24 Guaifenesin.

William Hanson 0:28:26 What's it got?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:27 It's got guaifenesin. It relieves chest congestion and thick mucus by the common cold, acute bronchitis, or respiratory infections.

William Hanson 0:28:39 But then there's a whole range of Mucinex as well.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:43 Right.

William Hanson 0:28:43 I mean, I have all of them at home.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:45 Of course you do.

William Hanson 0:28:46 I stock up on all of them for when I have my flu or flu-adjacent symptoms.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:28:50 Right. But I think we do sell— we have this medicine, we just call it different things, and it's probably a fraction of the price. I mean, it's like, you know, when you go to America and you buy, uh, they, they call their paracetamol Tylenol.

William Hanson 0:29:05 I took it when I— on Monday.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:07 They call paracetamol acetaminophen.

William Hanson 0:29:09 Yes, they do. Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:11 And acetaminophen is about 4 or 5 times the price of paracetamol in this country. Here we can buy a box of paracetamol for 39p.

William Hanson 0:29:21 Yep.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:22 In the supermarket. Over there, it costs a blooming fortune.

William Hanson 0:29:26 North America, innit?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:26 $25 for a tub of paracetamol. So anyway, well, Mucinex.

William Hanson 0:29:33 Mucinex.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:33 That's what you like.

William Hanson 0:29:34 I bet you the strength's different. I will send you my full range.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:38 Oh, okay.

William Hanson 0:29:38 Not, not in the post. I will just send you a picture of it.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:41 Oh, thanks very much.

William Hanson 0:29:42 They're mine.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:43 You're very generous.

William Hanson 0:29:44 Thank you. No, but if you ever need it, you let me know.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:29:46 Lovely. Oh, what's that? I'd better get that. It's probably NHS 111.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:31:42 Welcome back, Bucketheads. We've been discussing colds and flu, and it's now time for your questions. So let's check out our heaving bags of post, shall we? Do remember, if there's something on your mind that needs a luxury touch, postman@luxurypodcast.co.uk. is the place for your queries and your questions. Also, a reminder— sorry. Sorry for keeping you up.

William Hanson 0:32:07 Just finding you a bit dull.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:32:09 Also, a reminder, we're about to go on tour.

William Hanson 0:32:12 Yes. Oh, yes. God willing.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:32:14 The Manchester show is completely sold out. They can't wait for us.

William Hanson 0:32:20 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:32:21 In London, there are just a small handful of tickets left.

William Hanson 0:32:25 So few, actually.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:32:27 So, if you do want to come, and we'd obviously love to see you, well, grab yours before they sell out.

William Hanson 0:32:33 Now, this first question, it's a short question, is from Katie. Is there a more luxury way to blow your nose when you sound like a honking goose? I've never been able to blow quietly.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:32:42 I'm a big believer in a private blow.

William Hanson 0:32:52 I think a public one might be illegal.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:32:57 I do like to take myself off.

William Hanson 0:32:59 This is where, in another life, you'd be good as the Japanese, because they do not like blowing noses in front of other people. In fact, they find Japan— if we ever have the Japanese ambassador on, we can ask him this. In Japan, they will sniff to show that they are keeping their fluids, bodily fluids inside, and not blowing their nose in front of you.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:33:32 Well, now you see—

William Hanson 0:33:33 Whereas we would find that very irritating.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:33:34 Um, sniffing makes me want to batter someone to death.

William Hanson 0:33:39 Don't go to Japan.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:33:40 I mean, you know me, I'm not a violent person.

William Hanson 0:33:42 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:33:43 But even when I have a cold, if I sniff myself, it annoys me.

William Hanson 0:33:47 Right.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:33:48 The sound of other people sniffing Literally, it drives me to distraction.

William Hanson 0:33:53 Maybe we don't get the Japanese ambassador on.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:33:55 Why would he sniff?

William Hanson 0:33:57 Well, because that is correct etiquette in Japan, traditional etiquette. It's probably changing. We could ask him. That holding bodily fluid in front to show that you are doing that, whether you are even in a relationship with someone or business contact, friend, is more polite than just turning to one side as we were doing, blowing the nose and carrying on.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:34:15 Oh no.

William Hanson 0:34:15 They would have to completely leave the room.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:34:17 No, if I— if somebody sniffs around me, Someone, even that I don't know, if they do it a few times, I will then often say, sorry, do you need a tissue? Would you— do you need a tissue? And then if they kind of look and say, yes, I say, well, why don't you go and get one? Because I can't tolerate putting up with that noise. So go and get a tissue and blow your nose, please. Well, it's an infuriating sound.

William Hanson 0:34:43 Well, yes, it can be. Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:34:45 Dreadful.

William Hanson 0:34:47 So yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:34:47 And coughing. Coughing's annoying as well, isn't it?

William Hanson 0:34:49 One cough would you allow?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:34:50 You know I was saying I was quite a good nurse?

William Hanson 0:34:54 Yeah. You're not actually, are you?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:34:56 No, not really, because the— well, I'm good as long as I don't need to look at or listen to the ill person.

William Hanson 0:35:02 I think that is how you diagnose the person sometimes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:05 Yes, but I would be okay as long as I could then leave them in a part of the house, shut the door, and not have to put up with the sound of them. Because if they're coughing and sniffing, that's It's very annoying, isn't

William Hanson 0:35:15 it? Yeah, it is. Okay. So, you agree on a private blow.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:19 Private blow, take yourself off and let rip. You know, if you're going to blow your nose, go for it.

William Hanson 0:35:27 As a child, I couldn't blow my nose until I was about 12.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:30 Why not?

William Hanson 0:35:31 I don't know. I just couldn't do it.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:33 Now you're quite a loud blower, aren't you?

William Hanson 0:35:35 Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:36 I've heard you.

William Hanson 0:35:36 Oh, really?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:37 Yeah. Well, you don't mind blowing in front of others, do you?

William Hanson 0:35:41 No.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:42 I've been in the room and you suddenly whip it out. Your hanky.

William Hanson 0:35:54 Yes. Thank you for clarifying.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:35:56 And you blow.

William Hanson 0:35:57 Yeah, but I turn to the side. I don't—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:00 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:36:00 And if it's just once. If it was successive, I would excuse myself or go to a tiny corner of the room.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:06 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:36:08 And then come back.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:09 Oh, it's so annoying, isn't it? I hate colds.

William Hanson 0:36:12 Yeah, they're not nice.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:13 It's so annoying. Do you ever have a cold that is so bad that when you're on your own, you roll up 2 tissues and you stick them up your nose and you just leave them up there?

William Hanson 0:36:25 That must have been—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:28 Oh, you've never done that? Shall I show you what I mean?

William Hanson 0:36:31 No. I mean, oh, sorry. Yeah, well, yeah, sorry. Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:34 I mean, I don't have a cold, but shall I show you how— what I mean?

William Hanson 0:36:38 I mean, I think I vaguely get the concept.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:40 So, I— if I've got a bad cold, I'll kind of put one up there like that, and then I'll do one here, and then—

William Hanson 0:36:48 Just look down your camera. There's the thumbnail.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:51 And then I can just watch television and just kind of feel pathetic and weak.

William Hanson 0:36:57 Do you not struggle to breathe?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:36:59 No, because you need to breathe through your mouth anyway when you've got a cold, don't you? Because your nose is all blocked. So, you kind of lie there going, I feel so ill.

William Hanson 0:37:11 I wonder how special Cliff will be this week.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:37:13 Do you ever— Do you ever say that to yourself when you're ill? And you go, I feel so ill. Do you ever do that?

William Hanson 0:37:31 No. Because touch wood, I don't get that other than on Monday. I don't get that ill very often.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:37:36 Right. Well, there we go.

William Hanson 0:37:39 Do Jake next.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:37:40 Oh, Jake says, hi chaps, what are your sickness comforts? A cup of Horlicks or Ovaltine? Copious amounts of snacks or junk food? Any Spanish cleaning products that can be inhaled to clear one's nose?

William Hanson 0:37:54 No, I don't think we probably recommend inhaling Spanish cleaning products when you're ill. Or indeed when you're not ill.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:37:59 No, definitely not.

William Hanson 0:38:00 Only from a safe distance when you spritz it on a surface.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:03 I do like, um, I do like a bowl of, uh, Knorr Chicken Super Noodle Soup.

William Hanson 0:38:09 Oh.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:10 That is my—

William Hanson 0:38:11 It's not very luxury, John, is it?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:12 No, it's not. But I just kind of, if I'm feeling ill, that very often is— it makes me feel just a little bit happier.

William Hanson 0:38:19 Okay. A

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:20 little bit of that with a piece of toast.

William Hanson 0:38:22 Nice. Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:24 2 tissues stuck up my nose while I ate it.

William Hanson 0:38:27 Dry toast. is something that I was fed a lot as a child if I was ill.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:33 Dry toast?

William Hanson 0:38:34 Literally dry toast.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:35 Yeah, I remember those days.

William Hanson 0:38:36 Yeah, particularly if I'd been sick, you'd then start back on with dry toast, or then banana, smashed banana on toast. Yeah, that was a very you're ill food.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:44 Although, do you know what I've started doing since I've had dogs? I—

William Hanson 0:38:49 Don't say you eat dog food.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:51 No, no, no, but I will, I'll just have plain boiled rice,

William Hanson 0:38:56 Okay.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:38:56 Instead of dry toast, which is actually a better— if you need something very, very bland.

William Hanson 0:39:01 It's probably nicer.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:39:02 Just a bit of plain rice.

William Hanson 0:39:03 Do you do some butter in the water with it as well?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:39:06 No, no, no, no, I just— no, plain, just plain rice with some salt.

William Hanson 0:39:09 No, but Jonathan, next time you do rice—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:39:11 With some butter.

William Hanson 0:39:12 Wash the rice thoroughly numerous times depending on which rice brand you use. Which rice brand do you use?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:39:18 Tilda.

William Hanson 0:39:19 Fine, well, you only need to wash it once then, but other rice is washed numerous times. A little knob of butter.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:39:25 Oh, look at you, you devil.

William Hanson 0:39:26 Makes the rice beautiful.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:39:28 Because that's what you do with a dog, you see. If a dog has diarrhoea or an upset stomach, plain boiled rice, no salt, plain boiled rice for 24 hours sorts them out amazingly.

William Hanson 0:39:40 Nice. Lovely. Yeah. Okay. Scott says, how many consecutive sneezes is one entitled to be blessed for? Someone on a train recently sneezed 9 times in a row.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:39:50 So annoying.

William Hanson 0:39:51 I blessed the first 3, nodded on the 4th, and by this point onwards, I pretended they had ceased to exist? Is there an actual cutoff point? I think what Scott did was fine. I don't know if you would bless strangers. If I was on a train and— unless they were sitting next to me, but if they were—

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:06 No, I normally move away. I think, ooh.

William Hanson 0:40:09 No, I might go, bless you.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:12 Infectious. But do you know the multiple sneezes? Oh, that's so annoying. Yeah. And they go on and on and on and on and on.

William Hanson 0:40:20 But people are not sneezing on purpose, John. Oh,

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:23 it's so annoying.

William Hanson 0:40:24 Yeah, I guess.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:25 My producer, she does it quite often. She sneezes and I shout at her.

William Hanson 0:40:29 Which one? The one that begins with L or the one that begins with L?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:31 Laura! Laura sneezes multiple times and I shout, shut up! Drives me mad. Can't stand it, honestly.

William Hanson 0:40:41 Bizarrely, Laura has worked with you for many, many years. She has.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:46 But it's so annoying!

William Hanson 0:40:49 How long do you think she's worked for you?

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:51 Nearly 20 years.

William Hanson 0:40:52 Wow.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:40:52 Yeah, yeah, she's worked with me for a long time. Um, and the funny thing is, when I shout at her when she sneezes, which I do every time, um, she takes absolutely no notice.

William Hanson 0:41:04 No, clearly.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:05 No, she just carries on with the work as if I've not even said it. Other people around the office, you know, that don't know me very well, I'll look over and they'll be looking at me aghast as if to say, He's a monster. But she just carries on typing. She don't care less. Probably the best way to deal with me, to be honest.

William Hanson 0:41:24 Yeah. I always look in the New Year's Honours List to see if she's there.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:28 Any

William Hanson 0:41:32 day

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:32 now. Oh, do you know what, William?

William Hanson 0:41:35 Yeah.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:35 I've quite liked this today.

William Hanson 0:41:36 It's been quite a fun episode.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:38 I have really enjoyed it. I'm

William Hanson 0:41:40 feeling it. Basically, the way to be luxury with a cold or flu or flu-adjacent symptoms is don't go on about it and don't show

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:47 Keep it to yourself.

William Hanson 0:41:47 Keep it to yourself.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:48 Yes.

William Hanson 0:41:48 And it's not, you know, everyone's ill at some point.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:51 Yeah.

William Hanson 0:41:52 Don't go on about it.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:53 But don't spread it either.

William Hanson 0:41:55 Oh no.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:55 They're the people I can't stand.

William Hanson 0:41:58 Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:41:59 The people who are dripping with a cold, and then they go to the pub, and then they sit at the bar coughing and spluttering all over everyone. And you say, have you got a cold? Oh yeah, I feel terrible. Well, thanks very much indeed for coming to the pub and giving it to all of us, you selfish buffoon. I can't stand that.

William Hanson 0:42:19 No, so stay away.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:42:20 Yeah, well, we'll end on that note. Lovely.

William Hanson 0:42:22 Cheery note.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:42:23 Of course, we will be back tomorrow for one of our bonus episodes.

William Hanson 0:42:26 Yes.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:42:27 I'm looking forward to that.

William Hanson 0:42:28 Always good.

Jonathan Vernon-Smith 0:42:29 Lots to tell you, William. Until then, goodbye.