EP270: Nagging with Auntie Linny #33 – World Mental Health Day

Natalie Cassidy 0:00:29 Hello and welcome to Life with Nat on this lovely Thursday afternoon. On Saturday it is World Mental Health Day, so I have got The best person I can talk about this sort of stuff with, my sis. Auntie Lynnie's here. You all right, darling?

Auntie Linnie 0:01:00 Yeah. Hi. Hi, everyone.

Natalie Cassidy 0:01:02 We had a bit of a funny old weekend, didn't we?

Auntie Linnie 0:01:07 Had a bit of a boogie on Saturday. Boogie on a bit of candy. I dunno what you were doing. We were all doing candy. You were doing some strange moves.

Natalie Cassidy 0:01:16 I can never, I get the hang of it in about the last 30 seconds and then it stops. Every time.

Auntie Linnie 0:01:24 Yeah. Oh, you actually did get the hang of it, did you?

Natalie Cassidy 0:01:26 And then I do it, and then I do a couple of rounds and it goes off.

Auntie Linnie 0:01:29 I wish someone had got that on.

Natalie Cassidy 0:01:31 I get really upset. I sort of go back and then I'm going just the wrong way. Can't do it.

Auntie Linnie 0:01:36 It was good. It was such a lovely—

Natalie Cassidy 0:01:38 Did you enjoy it?

Auntie Linnie 0:01:38 No, it was brilliant. You smashed it, the 3 of you. Ah. It was a lovely—

Natalie Cassidy 0:01:42 Well, also, thank you for letting me go for a wee.

Auntie Linnie 0:01:44 Yeah, that was a bit sneaky of you, but she done me right up like a kipper. It was brilliant. It was just so lovely. to see so many people that have reached out that you can now put a face to a name. Yeah. There's too many of you to mention, so I'm not gonna start naming names, but I managed to catch up with a lot of our listeners. Obviously the usual crew were there.

Natalie Cassidy 0:02:10 Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:02:10 Our Queen Camilla and Sam and Bex, beautiful human beings. It was incredible. It was lovely. It was nothing, it was such a lovely afternoon.

Natalie Cassidy 0:02:21 We've said it before and I'll say it again, but especially because we are talking about mental health today. Just having a lot of women together in a room, like-minded people, they've obviously got the interest of the pod, so—

Auntie Linnie 0:02:34 They've got something in common.

Natalie Cassidy 0:02:36 You know, that's their— yeah, exactly. That's something they hold dear to them and that it's part of their week, so they immediately have something to talk about. There were so many solo people on their own.

Auntie Linnie 0:02:46 I, I'm— I was at— the amount of women I spoke to, again, I'm not going to start quoting names because there's so many of you and because I've got a really bad memory. And I would ask, are you with someone? Have you come on your own? No, I've come on my own. And I'm like, that's just amazing. Well, I don't think I would do— could do that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:03:05 I think you could.

Auntie Linnie 0:03:07 I think now that I'm older, but—

Natalie Cassidy 0:03:10 I think if you had an interest in something.

Auntie Linnie 0:03:12 Yeah, maybe. Maybe.

Natalie Cassidy 0:03:13 And then you'd started chatting on Facebook and—

Auntie Linnie 0:03:16 Well, just sitting on the table, you know, there was a— I think at one point there was actually a table that was all people that were on their own.

Natalie Cassidy 0:03:23 Oh, that's nice.

Auntie Linnie 0:03:23 And they've all ended up sitting together. 'Cause I asked, I can't remember if it was Rachel, I think it was Rachel who had come on her own. actually messaged in to say she was coming on her own. And I said, make a point of introducing yourself, even if we have met before. Which she did. Yeah. And I said, oh, you're not on your own, you know, you're talking to people. She said, yeah, there's a few of us on this table that are on our own. I said, that's amazing. Honestly, it warms my heart.

Natalie Cassidy 0:03:46 It's absolutely warming. And all of the feedback I've had, a few messages from people, and thank you so much. Obviously, we're gonna discuss it in detail with the girls, but, um, Just people saying it was a wholesome, fantastic afternoon. They've had a good laugh, a good dance, a good chinwag, met some new friends, and gone home happy.

Auntie Linnie 0:04:06 How better but to uplift yourself if you're having a bit of a crap week or a crap year? Something's happened that's causing you distress or upset, and a few ladies did talk to me with regards to You know, their situ— obviously, they know the pods we do, be it based on grief or mental health. And they did open up to me, which, again, ladies, I love, love, love how— well, just the voice notes we received today.

Natalie Cassidy 0:04:36 Yes.

Auntie Linnie 0:04:36 About mental health, how open people are, predominantly women. As we've discussed before, men are a closed book, aren't they? And that's so healing in itself, that you're sharing how you're feeling, what you've been through.

Natalie Cassidy 0:04:50 Well, I think it gives you that me too. Someone can say, oh no, I've been through that, or I feel like that sometimes, and you just go,

Auntie Linnie 0:05:00 well, you've— it's not just you.

Natalie Cassidy 0:05:01 It's not just me. I'm not on my own. Yeah, it's normal.

Auntie Linnie 0:05:04 Yeah,

Natalie Cassidy 0:05:05 to feel that way. And I think that is the power of conversation and the power of sharing. Mental World Health Day on Saturday, its theme is Tea and a Talk. And we were discussing hopefully doing some sort of afternoon tea and a talk in the new year.

Natalie Cassidy 0:05:21 You know, we're gonna have a real think about it, but, you know, like Auntie Lynne's Tea and Talk would be, I think, a fantastic thing. Let us know your thoughts, and if you'd like that, 07788 20 19 19. Before we start, we've had some really moving, heartfelt, and sad messages on the pod. Mm-hmm. I'm going to read out some numbers, which I think are really important.

Natalie Cassidy 0:05:44 In case you need to get help when you listen to this, as quickly as possible. So you can call 116 123 to talk to the Samaritans. If you're under 19, you can call 0800 1111, and that's to talk to Childline if you're under 19.

Natalie Cassidy 0:06:07 There's a fantastic charity, Mind, and they have a campaign against living miserably, CALM. And that's 0800 58 58 58, and that is open from 5 PM to midnight. If you are affected by suicide or you have any suicidal thoughts, you can speak to them. You also have the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK, which is 0800 587 0800, and all of those numbers I will put Underneath the pod for you. And again, we're having a conversation, we can have a laugh, it isn't deep, but those numbers are really important just in case you feel like you wanna talk to someone.

Auntie Linnie 0:06:49 And we must emphasise, we're not qualified in this field.

Natalie Cassidy 0:06:53 No.

Auntie Linnie 0:06:53 We're just here to have a chat, share our own experiences, and allow you guys to open up to us. So you you've got someone you can, even if it is putting it down in a text, that in itself is, can be very healing.

Natalie Cassidy 0:07:11 So healing. And we've had so, so many.

Auntie Linnie 0:07:13 Oh yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:07:13 But I thought I'd start with just talking about how I feel. I was talking to a mum at school and she was talking about how she feels quite anxious. And it's that feeling of just catching your breath a little bit more, being aware of your breath and just feeling a bit overwhelmed. Now, again, we've spoken, again, we've spoken about perimenopause, menopause. I don't know if this is the beginning of it. I feel very much, my cycle is very, very normal. There's no change within my menstrual cycle at all. But I used to be able to have 100 things lined up and not even think about it.

Auntie Linnie 0:07:56 Whereas now you feel overwhelmed when there's

Natalie Cassidy 0:07:59 a— I can't, It looks like a huge mountain. What used to be, this looks really fun.

Auntie Linnie 0:08:06 Really?

Natalie Cassidy 0:08:06 And I'm gonna do all of this.

Auntie Linnie 0:08:08 You're feeling overwhelmed, right?

Natalie Cassidy 0:08:09 I now go, oh, I've got that to do, that to do. I've got 4 days where I've got something to do. Right, yeah. Now I don't know if that is a mixture of—

Auntie Linnie 0:08:18 It's a combination of age, Natalie.

Natalie Cassidy 0:08:20 Or not being in a regular job anymore where I'm out all the time. I've been very fortunate to have more time at home. I'm a creature of habit. I love being at home. And actually, I think being busier will be really good for me.

Auntie Linnie 0:08:33 Yeah, me too. Because unfortunately, it's— life can be a bit habitual as well, can't it? If you get used to being at home and you've got your little routine, and then all of a sudden, like in your case, because there's no real structure to your week, 'cause you don't know— well, look, you've just said an appointment tomorrow has been moved already. Straight away you went, oh my God. I need childcare now. So that can automatically make you feel that element of anxiety. Mm-hmm. Because already what you had mapped out for tomorrow—

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:07 Has gone now.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:07 Has gone out the window. Yeah. Because someone's changed it for you.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:10 At 10 to 7 at night.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:11 At 10 to 7 at night with not a lot of notice. Mm-hmm. And again, there's an art to, I guess, learning or educating yourself to not allow something like that to cause you that anxiety because everything and anything can be resolved.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:26 Yes.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:26 And in life you can sometimes just say no.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:29 Yeah, that's true.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:30 If it doesn't work for you.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:31 Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:31 But easiest, easy for me maybe to say.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:33 You never say no.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:35 No.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:35 The most professional person in the world.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:37 No. It's not in my blood.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:38 You weren't well last week.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:40 Yeah. Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:40 You were in work. You don't have a day off.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:43 No.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:43 Just not in your nature.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:44 No.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:45 And I think—

Auntie Linnie 0:09:46 But it doesn't cause me anxiety or stress as such.

Natalie Cassidy 0:09:50 No.

Auntie Linnie 0:09:51 I don't feel it does. You know, I, I just, I just do it. I just, I sometimes think it becomes, it's, for me, it would cause me more stress not to do something if I can't do it or I feel like I'm, I've got so much, I've got so much on and I'm sort of causing myself my own problems. But it would cause me more stress not to do it than to just do it.

Natalie Cassidy 0:10:16 I do think though, I saw a couple of memes, you know, they come up on Insta or whatever, And there's sort of this bedraggled woman and all her hair's up and she's half dressed and she's like, yeah, I can help you. That is you. Not bedraggled, by the way.

Auntie Linnie 0:10:32 Bloody good evening, guys. She's having a go at me again.

Natalie Cassidy 0:10:36 But what I mean is, yeah, everybody goes to you.

Auntie Linnie 0:10:41 Well, the girl at work tonight said it because I said, I've gotta go home now. I'm gonna go to Nastasia's now. I'm going to do a pod. New girl. She went, You cram a lot into your day. 'Cause I showed him a video. I finished work yesterday, didn't walk 'cause Tina's away. Yeah. Went to Elia's and I'm jumping on a bouncy castle with James in my work clothing for about half an hour.

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:02 Brilliant. Well, that got your exercise in.

Auntie Linnie 0:11:06 Oh, so I got my steps in. Yeah. But I thrive on that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:10 I also think your regular walking,

Auntie Linnie 0:11:13 100%.

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:15 Is huge for your, for your mental health.

Auntie Linnie 0:11:18 Totally.

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:19 Without a doubt. I wonder if you didn't walk, if someone said you can't walk now and you had a few months not walking, I think it would severely affect you, genuinely.

Auntie Linnie 0:11:29 But that's why I can't give up work.

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:31 What do you mean?

Auntie Linnie 0:11:32 Because I know if I woke up tomorrow morning and I just got outta bed, And then just went downstairs and made a cup of tea. And then, um, was like, oh, what should I do now?

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:45 No, but you wouldn't, because you'd pop around here.

Auntie Linnie 0:11:47 Do your housework.

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:48 Yeah. Ellie's, Maria's.

Auntie Linnie 0:11:50 Yeah, I'd be a full-time cleaner, wouldn't I?

Natalie Cassidy 0:11:52 Then you would be helping me with my admin, do a few extra pods. Be great.

Auntie Linnie 0:11:58 But I would have to do that because I'd have to fill my day. I'm a doer, rightly or wrongly, that I have to be active. Your brother does, says it. He says, can't you just sit down for 5 minutes? I go, no, 'cause if I sit down, then I'm done for the day. So I'll just keep going. And then I enjoy my time, you know, 8 o'clock, 9 o'clock. I

Natalie Cassidy 0:12:16 was gonna say, what is your, 'cause I think people would like to know, we're always talking about Linda doing everything. She's out, Linnie, she's walking, she's working, she's, and we know all of that side.

Auntie Linnie 0:12:26 But it's everything. It's like even Friday we're having a team bonding evening, which is just 'cause we've got this new girl that started. Yeah. Lady, should I say. And we're just gonna go for a drink. And I said, oh no, we're not just going for a drink. We'll go to a pub that's got a dartboard and we'll have a darts competition. Oh yeah, that's true.

Natalie Cassidy 0:12:41 That's good.

Auntie Linnie 0:12:41 So just to— so you're— otherwise we're gonna sit there.

Natalie Cassidy 0:12:44 That's not your thing, is it? Just sat there, really?

Auntie Linnie 0:12:47 It's not even that. We're together, remember, we're together every day of the week. We're a small team. We're together every day of the week. And then we're gonna be out and—

Natalie Cassidy 0:12:54 Doing the same sort of thing, but with a drink.

Auntie Linnie 0:12:56 Whereas if it's— you're doing an active sport, it's alive, it's competitive.

Natalie Cassidy 0:13:00 Did you do well in the darts? 'Cause you are quite sporty.

Auntie Linnie 0:13:02 I used to play darts for Barclays, I'll have you know.

Natalie Cassidy 0:13:05 Did you do well?

Auntie Linnie 0:13:06 Of course I did.

Natalie Cassidy 0:13:07 Yeah, brilliant.

Auntie Linnie 0:13:09 But yeah, maybe that sums me up. Maybe I'm just a competitive person that feels that I can— Doing. And also I just feel like we're only here for a short time. There's just so much I want to do and cram in. It's just, do, you know, live your lives, fill your lives. There's so much out there I still want to do.

Natalie Cassidy 0:13:28 Yeah, I think it's wonderful, but I think the listeners wanna know.

Auntie Linnie 0:13:32 What do they wanna know?

Natalie Cassidy 0:13:32 What is your relaxing time? Talk us through when you get into bed, the things people don't know. Put the telly on? Like, what's just that little bit before bed?

Auntie Linnie 0:13:41 No, because you'll all freak out if I tell you what I do. No, we won't. You will, 'cause I log on and do a bit of work. I know. I clear my email so I'm ahead of the game for tomorrow. It never works.

Natalie Cassidy 0:13:52 I really didn't think you were gonna say that. That's terrible.

Auntie Linnie 0:13:58 I've got a book that I need to read.

Natalie Cassidy 0:14:00 In a week.

Auntie Linnie 0:14:02 Is that all we've got? A week? I've read one page and I really enjoyed it. And the first page, you know, I enjoyed it. I thought, I'm gonna like this book. You are. You're gonna love it. I've just gotta make time to do that. I will read this book. I love telly. Yeah. I do, I enjoy my TV. I'm watching The Blame Michelle Keegan. It was filmed in Hertford, so it's amazing to watch. Yeah. Obviously, The Traitors. I'm hooked. I love my soaps, EastEnders and Corrie. That's my pastime. I love TV. But again, I'm watching that at silly o'clock because I'm exhausted.

Natalie Cassidy 0:14:34 But that is your wind-down.

Auntie Linnie 0:14:35 But that's my wind-down. And I love films. going out with, you know, whether it's with Dave and friends and, or like, you know, work colleagues. I do think social is so important.

Natalie Cassidy 0:14:48 The social side.

Auntie Linnie 0:14:49 I really think it's so good for you to go out, have a nice blowout, whether it's with your mates.

Natalie Cassidy 0:14:55 Different conversations.

Auntie Linnie 0:14:56 Different conversations, different people, different interests. I just think it's so good for you. I think the

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:02 mixing with different people

Auntie Linnie 0:15:03 And I love that on set. Different people, different interests. Yeah. Different conversations. Yes. It's—

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:09 We're very like in that manner, I think.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:11 Yeah, I think it's lovely.

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:12 I'm fascinated by people.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:13 Me too.

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:14 Fascinated. That's why I love doing the listener pods on Patreon, getting 'em on for 20 minutes. You don't know what you're gonna get. Ringing people up. It's like you say, fascinating.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:23 'Cause it's a big world out there. We're—

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:24 I'm really hot. I'm just gonna take my socks off. Sorry. Sweating.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:28 I thought you did this before.

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:29 I know. I'm sorry. I'm so hot.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:31 Yeah, that's interesting.

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:32 To jump up because of the weather still.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:34 It is extremely mild.

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:35 Freezing this morning.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:36 Yeah, you've got to do the layers, haven't you?

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:39 It's boring.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:40 When I— no, but when— oh, she's trying to throw her smelly socks at me. Yeah, it's lovely weather though for October. Come on. Unbelievable. This is brilliant.

Natalie Cassidy 0:15:55 I'm bored stiff, but yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:15:57 I get it. I mean, I literally had to put tights— well, tights were Saturday, my first time I put tights on. However, how

Natalie Cassidy 0:16:01 wonderful for people who are worrying about their heating bills. We can keep that heating off for people. They're not gonna be cold. I mean, it's good.

Auntie Linnie 0:16:11 Again, financially, you know, a financial situation can cause people a hell of a lot of stress.

Natalie Cassidy 0:16:19 Absolutely. I would say one of the main causes of stress.

Auntie Linnie 0:16:24 But even mine have— Natalie, sometimes people suffer with it without even knowing what triggered that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:16:33 Absolutely, yeah, of course. Listen, when I did that health and social care course, we had a— obviously it was a couple of days and a few little questions in my exam about mental health. It's, you know, good mental health, bad mental health, how you perceive it is such a huge subject. We could just do a podcast every week on mental health.

Auntie Linnie 0:16:54 When was the last time you weren't okay? But when you're asked if you're okay, you say, yeah, I'm fine.

Natalie Cassidy 0:16:59 Probably that feeling of being overwhelmed with loads of stuff. For the first sort of week, I felt like that. I'd say, no, yeah, I'm all good.

Auntie Linnie 0:17:12 Yeah. But why do we do that? Why do you think?

Natalie Cassidy 0:17:14 Because we don't wanna burden people. You feel stupid. It's boring. You don't wanna come across as a moaner. And we are helping, we like helping people. I don't need any help from anyone else. I'll deal with it. Whereas actually, when I do say I feel completely overwhelmed with what's coming up, I said to Mark, I don't know what I'm gonna do not being at home at Christmas. I just, I can't picture what it's gonna be like.

Auntie Linnie 0:17:44 You? No. Our darling audience, listeners, sorry. Um, she hasn't stopped going on about it. She— it's my— it's cool. It's actually starting to stress me out now. But that just shows how much that is troubling you.

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:00 It's just because I love being at home at Christmas.

Auntie Linnie 0:18:03 But you're not going to be. You've committed to something

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:06 and

Auntie Linnie 0:18:07 it will be fantastic.

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:08 And it all changed last Friday because I went for my—

Auntie Linnie 0:18:15 Oh, your flying thing.

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:17 It was so good.

Auntie Linnie 0:18:18 There you go.

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:19 I was so worried about heights, about lots of different things. I won't go into it because it's all a surprise.

Auntie Linnie 0:18:26 Yeah,

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:27 but I was so worried because you know what I'm like with anything like—

Auntie Linnie 0:18:30 yeah,

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:31 and I smashed it.

Auntie Linnie 0:18:33 Oh really?

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:33 It was over in half the time it should have been.

Auntie Linnie 0:18:37 Oh,

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:37 they said they can't believe it, and I loved it. So immediately

Auntie Linnie 0:18:42 That's given you a bit

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:43 of— 50% of my worry is gone.

Auntie Linnie 0:18:45 We've just gotta get rid of the other 50%.

Natalie Cassidy 0:18:47 Which is just me being organised and I want people to have their presents and I wanna wrap my presents on time and I want—

Auntie Linnie 0:18:53 But if you want that, then just make it happen. I will do it. Yeah, just make it happen. This is the problem. We, we, you can spend so much time using all your energy. It's preventing. And worrying about something you cannot control. I know. You're doing the pantomime, fact.

Natalie Cassidy 0:19:09 Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:19:10 And it's dodged a bullet.

Natalie Cassidy 0:19:10 And it will be.

Auntie Linnie 0:19:11 And it will be fine. We know it'll be fine. And I get it. I totally get where you're coming from. And it's good in a way that you voice it because you're getting it out. But you've got to somehow just focus all that energy on getting organised with your Christmas presents.

Natalie Cassidy 0:19:28 Yes.

Auntie Linnie 0:19:28 And then, 'cause I'm doing that, Natalie, 'cause I feel exactly the same as you. I'm going away for 10 days in November, which for me means the best part of my November is written off. Coupled with the fact that a couple of weekends prior to going away, we've got live shows. Yes. So I've lost those weekends.

Natalie Cassidy 0:19:45 Sorry.

Auntie Linnie 0:19:45 No, it's fine. I love doing them and seeing all our listeners. But I've got Christmas too. So what am I doing? I'm starting to purchase Christmas presents. But— To alleviate that stress.

Natalie Cassidy 0:19:59 You're absolutely right. But imagine now, just so you under— I'm putting yourself in my shoes, that you're out

Auntie Linnie 0:20:05 at 8

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:05 AM. No, I get it. 10 to 11 PM. Mm-hmm. For the whole of, you've got no, you're not.

Auntie Linnie 0:20:12 You just gotta organise. You've got to be organised.

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:13 I know, but I'm quite busy before then as well. But do you know what? I'm very grateful to be busy.

Auntie Linnie 0:20:17 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:17 There's some really exciting things, really boring, can't tell you about them, everyone.

Auntie Linnie 0:20:22 Coming up.

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:22 But things have come up. I can't believe they've come up. I've had to say yes.

Auntie Linnie 0:20:25 So imagine if it was the other way round. Yeah. And you, and you, you are someone that's just lost your job, been made redundant.

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:31 I'm sat at home and I can't afford Christmas.

Auntie Linnie 0:20:33 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:33 So I have thought of that, I promise you.

Auntie Linnie 0:20:35 But we've gotta, you've always gotta try and think. Turn it. Yeah. Turn it on its head. Turn it on its head, yeah. And make it, and make it a positive thing rather than a stressful and negative thing.

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:44 Yeah. And I'm not sitting here, please, there are people, you're probably thinking, oh, poor her, she's gotta go to pantomime every night and have a laugh.

Auntie Linnie 0:20:50 But everyone's stress is their own stress, isn't it? Over different things. Yeah, yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:20:54 Talking of which, shall we get on with some of these?

Auntie Linnie 0:20:56 Yeah, please, 'cause there's quite a few.

Speaker D 0:20:58 Hi, love. Here's my little bit about mental health and what I do to help my mental health, particularly in this perimenopausal stage of life where You know, as we know, things can be really tough. For me, my way of sharing my worries or dealing with when I'm feeling a bit down is basically to go to a fitness class.

Speaker D 0:21:20 I am blessed to have an amazing lot of powerhouses of women around me who go to these classes, you know, 2, 3, 4 times a week. And in that hour that you're there, you're not thinking about anything else. You are just in that moment. doing your absolute best, absolutely sweating, laughing together, crying together. It's just utter joy.

Speaker D 0:21:44 But yeah, it— that's my therapy, I guess, which is an absolute laugh really, 'cause at school I was the person that never wanted to do PE. I always used to get my mum to write me a note in cross-country or whatever, but I actually wouldn't be without it or without those girls in my life. Yeah, it's incredible really. But everyone to their own, isn't there? And everyone has to find their own thing.

Speaker D 0:22:06 But having, particularly other women, to talk to is the most important thing. I couldn't be without other women in my life to discuss things with. And even if it is just for someone to go, oh yeah, me too, and just for you to think, actually, I'm not the only person that feels this way, then that to me is everything. Anyway, I'm gonna stop waffling. I've gone over the minute, but, um, hi, Auntie Linnie, love you.

Speaker D 0:22:33 Bye.

Auntie Linnie 0:22:34 What a lovely human she is.

Natalie Cassidy 0:22:35 You can meet some very special people in life, and Bex and I have certainly connected.

Auntie Linnie 0:22:41 She's a lovely girl, really is. She's a really nice girl. Yeah, had a nice chat with her on Saturday. She's got a very calming demeanour, hasn't she? When she speaks, it's very calming. You can listen to her and, yeah, she's a lovely soul. She really is. I'm not just blowing smoke up your arse. Schmoozy. She's a schmoozy. She's a lovely lady, yeah, really is. And she's absolutely Absolutely spot on.

Natalie Cassidy 0:23:06 Again, exercise in the company of women. And I'm not— again,

Auntie Linnie 0:23:12 it sounds

Natalie Cassidy 0:23:12 like we're bashing men. Yeah, just saying that you're comfortable, you're talking about—

Auntie Linnie 0:23:16 No, it's because again, the man's not going to be able to relate to perimenopause, menopause, or stresses of running a home, maybe, because ultimately it—

Natalie Cassidy 0:23:25 And that load, yeah, that load on the brain that we have. Yeah, it is very different. I will say it, and I'll say it all the time, and that book came out years ago, Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. We are different animals. I'm not saying it's right, wrong, or indifferent. We're completely different.

Auntie Linnie 0:23:41 And I do think women do have to take on so much more now than say back in the day of, you know, where women were stay-at-home, didn't go to work, run the house, of course, did the cooking.

Natalie Cassidy 0:23:53 Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:23:54 But now we're doing that and everything else that comes with it. So, Of course, being in female company is probably going to benefit— oh, you're tall, listen to it.

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:08 People won't mind. She's having a sing-song in the shower.

Auntie Linnie 0:24:11 She's singing in the bath. She's singing in the bath. Yeah, we're good. You're gonna get it. If you say to a woman, oh, you know, I feel really shit today. My hair, I've just washed my hair.

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:22 And it feels all yucky.

Auntie Linnie 0:24:23 It's all flat.

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:23 Exactly.

Auntie Linnie 0:24:24 You know, I feel like it's got thinner than ever. You're gonna get it. Because unfortunately, again, this is one of

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:30 the— Oh, my breasts really hurt.

Auntie Linnie 0:24:31 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:32 Or I'm so bloated this, and I feel like this, and my jeans are too tight. Yeah. Or I really fancy crying.

Auntie Linnie 0:24:38 Yeah. You

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:39 know, it's just different.

Auntie Linnie 0:24:40 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:41 It's just different.

Auntie Linnie 0:24:42 And it's so good to have female company. And again, not everybody has that. No.

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:46 I mean, if Mark was to say to me, my ball bags are heavy, I'm not gonna know. No, but I'm not gonna know, am I?

Auntie Linnie 0:24:53 I thought you had balls.

Natalie Cassidy 0:24:54 You thought I had balls? I thought you had some balls. We've got, we've certainly got some men Balls that aren't there, I'll tell you that. Balls of bloody steel is what we've got.

Auntie Linnie 0:25:02 Well, I might be growing some soon, 'cause when they've been making me my, um, morning coffee at work, which I do thank you very much, team, I'm not knocking you, it transpires that instead of putting my collagen in the coffee, they've been putting my boss's collagen in.

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:18 I have to say, your voice did sound a bit gruff, and I did think a beard was coming along, but listen, each to their own. I've always— I think we did an app once, didn't we, where we changed your face and you just looked like Dom when you've got a beard.

Auntie Linnie 0:25:30 Yeah, you did.

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:31 Yeah. No, you did.

Auntie Linnie 0:25:33 What?

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:33 No, I think I did as well. Yeah. Which is strange 'cause we are not related. But anyway.

Auntie Linnie 0:25:37 I thought you was gonna say I looked like the person that won the Eurovision Song Contest.

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:42 Oh yeah. Hang on.

Auntie Linnie 0:25:44 Who was it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:46 Conchita? No.

Auntie Linnie 0:25:47 I don't know. What was her name? I had a beard.

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:49 Was it Conchita?

Auntie Linnie 0:25:50 I don't know.

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:51 Oh, everyone will be screaming.

Auntie Linnie 0:25:52 Go on, scream, scream.

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:53 But yeah. You know who I mean?

Auntie Linnie 0:25:56 And everybody said, oh, that looks like—

Natalie Cassidy 0:25:57 Well, listen, I look like Honeydew. What can we do? Well, we've all done things. Hey Nat, just seen your message for your next pod.

Natalie Cassidy 0:26:04 We have had an awful 2026 in relation to mental health, and our close family is still in a secure unit with no light at the end of the tunnel just yet. But with that, my father-in-law passing, it has been a tough year. Me and my husband are now closer than ever. He was really struggling and we were lucky enough to access therapy. This and seaside walks and talks have been a godsend.

Natalie Cassidy 0:26:25 We have also included our 5-year-old in this journey as appropriate, and we're, we're actively encouraging sharing moments when we may be struggling and making it less taboo to talk about. He is amazing, and sharing his worries or understanding that being sad isn't a bad feeling or a feeling we should hide. And that is from our listener Natalie.

Auntie Linnie 0:26:45 Well put, Natalie. And that's true. Being sad isn't something you should hide or be ashamed of.

Natalie Cassidy 0:26:51 It's just another emotion. It's

Auntie Linnie 0:26:52 just an emotion that, yeah, if you can share that emotion with people around you, A, they start to have an understanding. Because again, unless you've, you know, sometimes in life when you've experienced, like we, we have our grief pod, don't we?

Natalie Cassidy 0:27:06 Absolutely.

Auntie Linnie 0:27:07 For me, that's such an easy pod.

Natalie Cassidy 0:27:10 Well, we could just talk. I could talk about it every time we're here for an hour.

Auntie Linnie 0:27:14 Because we've been through it.

Natalie Cassidy 0:27:15 We know the pain, different pains, everyone goes through whatever, but you've been through it. So I think, I think it's really brave actually, Natalie. I think it's really brave that you have included your 5-year-old in that. Yeah. I think it's a great learning curve. And I think, I don't know if I would've been brave enough to include my 5-year-old in that. And I think it's really good because now the more we learn about children, the more open you are, the better it is emotionally for them growing up.

Auntie Linnie 0:27:44 And I think again, schools are very much now in—

Natalie Cassidy 0:27:49 Well, they have all their PHSE, they're discussing emotions and all of that, but everything starts in the home.

Auntie Linnie 0:27:55 Yeah, agreed.

Natalie Cassidy 0:27:56 So I commend you and I think it's great. And your seaside walks and therapy.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:02 Yeah. What better therapy than walking along the sea?

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:05 How beautiful. Fresh air, talking and supporting each other, you and your husband.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:10 Yeah, and fresh air is so important, and getting out, getting out of the house is, you know, the working remotely now for many people, that can be very isolating.

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:19 I think so.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:20 And you're not leaving, in some cases people aren't leaving their homes for days on end. That's really not healthy. And then you become insular, and then you don't wanna go out. No. You know, it's that feeling, like, you know, if you haven't been out for—

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:33 That's what I've said to you.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:34 Socially gone out, say.

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:35 No, but I'm saying I spend a lot of time at home.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:37 Yes, you do.

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:38 I'm very happy at home.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:39 Really nice. See, and I don't see that because obviously I'm out all day, every day.

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:43 Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:43 Then you forget, yeah, Natalie probably doesn't have to go out every

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:46 day. Well, don't get me wrong, I'm doing the school run, I'm doing this, I'm going shopping, I'm doing this. But if I wanted to, from quarter to 9.

Auntie Linnie 0:28:53 You could be at home all day.

Natalie Cassidy 0:28:54 Yeah, and I am. I don't leave off. But you're mostly— Anyhow, it's this, yeah. I'm doing stuff, or I'm washing, or I'm doing whatever. But yeah, I could easily just,

Auntie Linnie 0:29:06 Well, yeah, I've seen it a bit like even with your brother, you know, where he's not been well and not socialising as much as he was.

Natalie Cassidy 0:29:13 Of course.

Auntie Linnie 0:29:14 I, you know, I check in on him regularly now. Yeah. Because I'm mindful that he's spent—

Natalie Cassidy 0:29:19 It's a long day.

Auntie Linnie 0:29:20 Yeah, it's a long day. I mean, don't get me wrong, he's always quite liked his own company. As much as he's very social, he equally does very well with his own company. And we're lucky we have a nice-sized garden so he can potter around in the garden. Of course. I worry probably more than he does, 'cause I know if I was at home all day on my own, I think I would genuinely struggle. I, I, yeah, I, I—

Natalie Cassidy 0:29:43 No, I can, I can, I never struggle. I'm never bored.

Auntie Linnie 0:29:47 Really?

Natalie Cassidy 0:29:48 Ever. You're a potter, you do this, you do that, your emails come in, you're thinking of new things. But then I've been walking. I've been going out for a good hour.

Auntie Linnie 0:29:58 Oh, so you're still doing your walking?

Natalie Cassidy 0:29:59 Yeah, I've been doing it a good hour, which—

Auntie Linnie 0:30:01 Again, that, you're out then, aren't you?

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:03 Oh, it's lovely. And it does make a huge difference. Yeah. To how you, you, you think. It's huge. Yeah. Massive.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:10 What, what mad, isn't it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:11 Yeah. It's incredible.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:12 It's the physical act, isn't it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:14 And that air, that fresh air.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:15 Fresh air. I

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:16 don't feel like, I, I know people say they go to the gym and they love the gym and all of that. Mm-hmm. But the walking outside for me is definitely what suits me.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:24 Me too.

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:25 Mm-hmm. It suits me. This is also from Natalie and she said, I know you hear this a lot, but your pod has got me through some of the real dark times this year and I appreciate it every week.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:36 Oh, Natalie.

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:36 No.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:36 So good to hear that, isn't it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:38 It's, yeah. I mean, it's better than anything.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:40 And again, we sound like a broken record, I know, but that makes this whole pod completely worthwhile, doesn't it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:47 Nothing else matters.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:48 Whether we're just getting someone through another day.

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:51 Yep.

Auntie Linnie 0:30:51 Or putting a smile on someone's face or making someone laugh out loud.

Natalie Cassidy 0:30:55 Well, there was a glitch the other morning. My apologies for everyone. There was a glitch where the, the— I think the episode, Monday's episode was locked.

Auntie Linnie 0:31:05 All right.

Natalie Cassidy 0:31:05 And it was a Patreon only, but it was locked.

Auntie Linnie 0:31:07 Right.

Natalie Cassidy 0:31:08 But the amount of people said, I feel discombobulated.

Auntie Linnie 0:31:11 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:31:12 I'm getting in the car, it's not there. Where is it? Where it's their habitual thing to go on. And it really made me realise that's really important. I'm sorry, it's a tech issue. And it was all sorted within a couple of hours. But,

Auntie Linnie 0:31:23 but again, for people, it threw them because that's their little routine. Their little routine. Yeah. Yeah. Really important. And that's why it's That's why it's so important even through, yeah, the month of December.

Natalie Cassidy 0:31:31 And that's why, again, that's another added pressure, a good one.

Auntie Linnie 0:31:35 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:31:35 But I wanna make sure all the pods are coming out and I'm not, you know, slacking on them and just popping out a load of crap. I want it to be good and I'm thinking of those and I'm looking at dates. So, yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:31:50 Hey, I have struggled with my mental health since losing my dad last year. I've had 11 years of death, close relatives with cancer, etc. I don't think we realise the toll it takes until everything settles down. In February, I decided I needed to get my spark back and started strength training. It really helped with my confidence, posture, and helped me to start laughing at the little things.

Natalie Cassidy 0:32:16 I have recently took a dip on Dad's 1-year anniversary. But I've realised the power of being outside. Fresh air, trees, the beach, and walking. It's taken me long enough. Laughing face.

Natalie Cassidy 0:32:29 Mm-hmm. Alongside these things, your podcast features heavily, and I try really hard to do something creative for half an hour a day. I find it meditative and it relaxes me. Knitting, sewing, embroidery, cross stitch, hand piecing quilts, crochet. I love it all.

Natalie Cassidy 0:32:48 I'm still working full-time, so that half an hour a day is so good. Lastly, I have learned that you do need to look after yourself and afford yourself the same compassion, care, and time that you would give to someone else. I think the majority of us put ourselves last. It's not about being selfish, it's important. Thank you for all you do, Karen.

Auntie Linnie 0:33:09 Yeah, and again, again, all that she's saying, all the things.

Natalie Cassidy 0:33:13 She's absolutely We are trained, I feel, and I don't know why it is. I don't know, it's how we've been brought up or magazines and articles we've read, television we watch, and now social media. But, you know, it can't be social media for me 'cause that's not been around long enough. So I think it's all of the media that we have been seeing, all the material we've been shown, or family members when we're listening to people talk as we grow up. We are made to feel guilty if you are doing something—

Auntie Linnie 0:33:42 For yourself.

Natalie Cassidy 0:33:43 For yourself, if it is a pastime.

Auntie Linnie 0:33:45 And that's such a bad trait.

Natalie Cassidy 0:33:47 You are made to feel like that is wrong. If I wanna sit down and write something for half an hour, I should do that.

Auntie Linnie 0:33:56 But

Natalie Cassidy 0:33:57 I don't, I potter about and I think, oh, I'll hoover that room and do— when actually it's probably better for me to sit and do something I enjoy doing.

Auntie Linnie 0:34:05 Agreed.

Natalie Cassidy 0:34:06 Be that writing, be that looking at a painting. And it just feels, that is so indulgent. It's lazy almost.

Auntie Linnie 0:34:15 There's no disrespect to men. I mean, Dave doesn't feel guilty going golf on a Saturday for 9 hours.

Natalie Cassidy 0:34:22 Or goes to the railway. Again—

Auntie Linnie 0:34:24 Imagine if we did that. Imagine me disappearing for 9 hours playing a sport or going trekking or whatever it might be. Just wouldn't— you just couldn't. I would feel so guilty.

Natalie Cassidy 0:34:35 Well, there you go. And we shouldn't. No, no. And we're talking about half an hour, an hour a day.

Auntie Linnie 0:34:40 Tell you what I do do. I mean, I don't do it regularly enough.

Natalie Cassidy 0:34:43 Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:34:43 What I find very relaxing, I'm very fortunate to have a neighbour who's a beautician.

Natalie Cassidy 0:34:49 Yes.

Auntie Linnie 0:34:49 Is the odd facial or massage.

Natalie Cassidy 0:34:52 And I'm pleased you do so.

Auntie Linnie 0:34:53 That's what I do. Now it's just come to me. That's something that, when I feel like I've had a tough few months and my shoulders are starting to feel like, you know, that they ache, you can feel your head on your neck. Yeah. I book myself in for a facial or a massage, and that is a real treat.

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:11 Yeah, okay.

Auntie Linnie 0:35:12 That's lovely. And that really, that really soothes me, helps me relax.

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:18 Plus she's next door, so if you do it late, you can roll into bed.

Auntie Linnie 0:35:20 Exactly that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:21 Do you sleep better once you've done that?

Auntie Linnie 0:35:22 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:23 Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:35:23 Yeah. Because it's a complete— well, you're completely, imagine it's an hour and a half. Maria will do an hour and a half, soft music, candles lit. Yeah, it's lovely. It really is lovely. Now that, I adore.

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:37 I'm pleased you do that. That's good. See?

Auntie Linnie 0:35:39 And I highly recommend that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:41 We've got something out of it. There you go.

Auntie Linnie 0:35:42 I've just remembered that. But shows that I'm overdue one as well. But that's a lovely—

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:47 But again, that is—

Auntie Linnie 0:35:48 But again, it's a cost. It comes with a cost.

Natalie Cassidy 0:35:51 It's cost and—

Auntie Linnie 0:35:52 Whereas walking is free. Fresh air is free. But you know, every now and then, again, it's something, a gift.

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:00 Yes. A lovely feeling. Buy me a voucher. Or you save up for it, budget for it.

Auntie Linnie 0:36:04 Yeah. Yeah. It's a lovely relaxing—

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:07 I never do anything like that.

Auntie Linnie 0:36:08 You do? No.

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:09 Whenever I do have a massage—

Auntie Linnie 0:36:11 It's like a sports massage for you, isn't it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:13 Well, but whenever I have one, anyone who's ever given me a massage said, you, you're

Auntie Linnie 0:36:17 knotted. Yeah. Remember, do you remember back in the day you used to book someone to come to yours and we'd all have that?

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:22 Alison.

Auntie Linnie 0:36:22 Yeah. Do you remember that?

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:24 It was so good. Yeah. But she used to say, Natalie, please, you can't, you've gotta do this every 6 weeks.

Auntie Linnie 0:36:28 But then you should be doing it, even if you don't do it every 6 weeks, Natalie, it's so good for you.

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:33 Any masseur is like, I've never known a body like it where it's so tight.

Auntie Linnie 0:36:37 Yeah, that's so bad.

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:39 There you go.

Auntie Linnie 0:36:39 Do you think us women have to be so much more resilient than men have to be? We've gotta keep it all—

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:48 Going?

Auntie Linnie 0:36:49 Yeah, we've gotta put on a— I think so. Zip up a lip.

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:52 No, I think it's—

Auntie Linnie 0:36:53 I'm okay, I can do X, I can do Y, I'm gonna do Z.

Natalie Cassidy 0:36:56 I don't think so. I think men do have a lot of stress.

Auntie Linnie 0:37:00 But they—

Natalie Cassidy 0:37:01 In their own different ways.

Auntie Linnie 0:37:02 Do you think they just hide it and—

Natalie Cassidy 0:37:03 I think they can hide it. I think we, because we're talkers, I think we're more comfortable talking to women about it. But I also think we are made completely differently. We birth children. If you just go back through, history of time, and you look at hunter-gatherers and all of that, women, female animals, all of that, they are carers.

Auntie Linnie 0:37:35 Mm.

Natalie Cassidy 0:37:36 They have sole responsibility in most cases, not all cases, but of children, keeping things alive. It's that, whereas the man will go out and they'll get bits and they'll hunt and they'll grab stuff, and, but you're kind of the The matriarchal figure. And I think that doesn't go away through time.

Auntie Linnie 0:37:56 So you believe in most families, the woman, the woman is the matriarch?

Natalie Cassidy 0:38:00 I do.

Auntie Linnie 0:38:01 Yeah,

Natalie Cassidy 0:38:01 I do. Correct me if I'm wrong. I'm probably wrong.

Auntie Linnie 0:38:07 Again, another pressure, isn't it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:38:10 This is quite long, but it's good. Here we go. 'Cause I've got to talk about this.

Natalie Cassidy 0:38:14 Going off piste a little bit. Hi Nat, I've been through one hell of a journey with my mental health over the past few years. I'm postmenopausal and out of nowhere, was hit with the worst anxiety and panic attacks I've ever experienced. At times, I genuinely thought I was losing my mind. I didn't recognise myself, and I couldn't understand what was happening to me.

Natalie Cassidy 0:38:33 Thankfully, I'm in a much better place now. I still have anxiety, but I understand it better, and most importantly, I've learnt how to manage it rather than letting it manage me. That's good. Although I'm not going to pretend I've got it completely sussed, I still have the odd what the hell is happening to me moment. What made such a huge difference was talking to people.

Natalie Cassidy 0:38:56 Here we go again. My close friends and colleagues were incredible, and honestly, I don't think I would have got through the worst of it without them. Just being able to say I'm struggling today without feeling judged was enormously important.

Natalie Cassidy 0:39:12 What has really surprised me is how many people have since opened up to me about their own anxiety and panic attacks, things they'd never told anyone because they were worried they'd be seen as silly.

Natalie Cassidy 0:39:22 Dramatic, or somehow not coping properly. It's made me realise just how many people are quietly struggling behind closed doors. That's why I think conversations about mental health are so important. Sometimes you don't need someone to fix you, you just need someone to listen and remind you that you're not going mad, that you're not alone, and you will get through it. Here we go for my rant.

Natalie Cassidy 0:39:46 I have to say, I find it incredibly frustrating when people like Katie Hopkins—

Auntie Linnie 0:39:50 Oh, interesting.

Natalie Cassidy 0:39:51 Mock someone such as Alison Hammond. Oh,

Auntie Linnie 0:39:54 I was gonna bring that up. How funny.

Natalie Cassidy 0:39:55 Whatever your opinions on someone, there is absolutely nothing funny about ridiculing a person for talking honestly about anxiety or vulnerability. If anything, people who speak openly about these things are helping others feel brave enough to do the same. So if you're struggling, talk to someone. A friend, a colleague, a family member, professional, anyone you trust. You might be amazed at how many people understand exactly what you're going through. And if nothing else, my experience has taught me that hormones can apparently decide to throw you into an existential crisis without so much as sending a memo first.

Auntie Linnie 0:40:30 Yeah. Very well written.

Natalie Cassidy 0:40:32 Absolutely love the pod, and it certainly helps me unwind and have a giggle. Another very important thing for mental health. Yeah. Best wishes.

Auntie Linnie 0:40:42 Again, laughing is a massive tonic. It's good to laugh.

Natalie Cassidy 0:40:45 Laughing, finding—

Auntie Linnie 0:40:46 A real deep belly laugh is so,

Natalie Cassidy 0:40:49 so

Auntie Linnie 0:40:50 refreshing. Yeah. And it's interesting, I've not read that particular message. I must have missed that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:40:56 Did you see?

Auntie Linnie 0:40:57 I saw a bit on social, I didn't see it. I saw a bit on social media. She's obviously had some kind of panic attack whilst—

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:04 She was hosting This Morning.

Auntie Linnie 0:41:06 Yeah. No, she was escorted.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:07 And she was escorted off.

Auntie Linnie 0:41:08 Wow.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:09 And obviously everyone was very, very concerned. And they've checked her heart over and whatever. And she's had a panic attack. Allegedly. I'm not quite, I have to say that in case I get sued, but it looks as if that way.

Auntie Linnie 0:41:19 That's what happened.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:20 And she took a picture of herself on Insta, 'cause she does. It's Alison Hammond. Yeah. 'Cause she's amazing.

Auntie Linnie 0:41:24 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:24 With her gown on. Thanks so much for your thoughts, but nothing, you know, don't worry.

Auntie Linnie 0:41:28 But I saw Katie Hopps, I saw that on social media.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:32 Did you see what she called her?

Auntie Linnie 0:41:33 Yeah, I did. Well, I saw, I watched it. I watched her rant, um, basically implying that it was attention-seeking. And she kept referring to, well, her size, I guess, although she's not very big.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:47 Um, she referred to her—

Auntie Linnie 0:41:50 A chubber something.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:52 A chumba wumba.

Auntie Linnie 0:41:52 That was it, something like that. It's terrible.

Natalie Cassidy 0:41:55 She— Hang

Auntie Linnie 0:41:59 on. I mean, she's a braver person than I am. Old Katie Hopkins.

Natalie Cassidy 0:42:03 Fucking appalling human being. I hope she comes for me one day.

Auntie Linnie 0:42:08 Well, now you've said that, I think she will be around.

Natalie Cassidy 0:42:12 Oh, Katie, come, come round here. Let's, in fact, I'll invite you over. Let's have a discussion. She was clutching her chest, Alison. Now, no, I'm not being rude. What if she had had a heart attack?

Auntie Linnie 0:42:23 Oh, we got—

Natalie Cassidy 0:42:24 Or a stroke.

Auntie Linnie 0:42:25 It's regardless. No, it doesn't matter if she hasn't had one. Panic attack. can feel obviously like that. And they're very— again, it's a very distressing emotion that, you know, in the moment it can be extremely frightening. And for poor Alison, it's happened while she's on set.

Natalie Cassidy 0:42:43 Please tell me that ITV News main feature wasn't Alison Hammond, who used to be a significant chumba wumba about the size of a brick shit shed, to be quite honest with you. Because she thought she might have had a minor panic attack.

Auntie Linnie 0:42:58 How's she allowed to put this out there?

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:00 Unfortunately, people are allowed to do what they wanna do. And unfortunately, because she's so vile, people watch it. And what everyone needs to do is stop watching it.

Auntie Linnie 0:43:12 I know, but because it's so shocking. I watched it. I watched it 'cause I thought, what's going on? I heard a little bit about it

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:18 and I thought, oh, I love reading about it because I had, so again, She's getting her wish. Yeah. 'Cause everyone's talking about her.

Auntie Linnie 0:43:24 Yeah. Well, we're doing it. We shouldn't. Giving her a platform.

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:25 We shouldn't talk about it. We're giving her a platform. But I find it disgusting that people are allowed to call people those names.

Auntie Linnie 0:43:31 But what is she trying to prove?

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:32 She just wants views, doesn't she? I dunno what she wants. She's not even in the country. I think she's on holiday or something. Why are you bothered? You're not even— go away. Just do what you wanna do.

Auntie Linnie 0:43:41 And has Alison reacted to this?

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:43 In a very classy way.

Auntie Linnie 0:43:45 Has she?

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:47 Response was—

Auntie Linnie 0:43:47 She has reacted to it, has she? Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:49 Her response was, which I don't know if I could do.

Auntie Linnie 0:43:52 No, I'm not sure mine would be classy either.

Natalie Cassidy 0:43:55 She said, I'm still a chumba wumba babs with a heart. I thought it was a heart attack and it was very scary. I wouldn't wish it on anyone, even you, because you are beautiful on inside and out.

Auntie Linnie 0:44:07 Wow. Well done, you.

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:10 What a classy lady.

Auntie Linnie 0:44:12 Well, I'm not sure I would've called her beautiful inside and out. Yes. But I, yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:19 Gosh. I just can't believe that's allowed to, isn't there a thing that for Instagram to say you, you've gotta block harmful content? Again, going back to all that shit. But I don't think that's a, that's not nice.

Auntie Linnie 0:44:30 Look, look, I'm all for freedom of speech. I'm all for people having their say. And it's rude.

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:35 And people can have their views, but you can't be rude like that.

Auntie Linnie 0:44:37 But that's rude.

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:38 It's rude.

Auntie Linnie 0:44:38 Just who, why she, and how's that been allowed to go out and not be blocked? blocked or removed or chumba. What is she talking about?

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:46 I don't know.

Auntie Linnie 0:44:46 And again, she's undoing everything that we are trying to do, even by just doing this pod.

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:53 Absolutely.

Auntie Linnie 0:44:54 Is make people be open about

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:56 how they feel,

Auntie Linnie 0:44:57 how they feel.

Natalie Cassidy 0:44:58 What about people who maybe look like Alison or mate, whatever, and they think, oh my God, am I a chumba woman? Yeah. It's disgusting.

Auntie Linnie 0:45:06 No, it's really not good.

Natalie Cassidy 0:45:08 It's really bad.

Auntie Linnie 0:45:09 But please, Katie, we'd love to have you on our pod.

Natalie Cassidy 0:45:12 Oh, pop on in.

Auntie Linnie 0:45:13 And we can have a right old—

Natalie Cassidy 0:45:15 Pop on in here. Debate. I've got some pretty important people coming up, Katie. You can be at the bottom of the list if you wish, because really, I'd rather not speak to you, but I think my listeners would really enjoy me having a go at you.

Auntie Linnie 0:45:27 I'd really like to speak to her. Would you? I find her quite interesting, yeah. I'd love to know what her underlying issues are.

Natalie Cassidy 0:45:35 Oh. She's got some massive issues.

Auntie Linnie 0:45:37 But yeah, take us on. Go on. There's a, there's a, um, what's the word I'm looking for? Natalie, help me.

Natalie Cassidy 0:45:45 Challenge?

Auntie Linnie 0:45:45 That's the word. Yeah, for you. Come and take on a couple of Cassidys. Yeah, not, not good.

Natalie Cassidy 0:45:53 It's not good at all.

Auntie Linnie 0:45:54 Alison's taken it and dealt with it in a very professional way.

Natalie Cassidy 0:45:59 Absolutely.

Auntie Linnie 0:46:00 Good for her.

Speaker E 0:46:02 Hi Natalie and Auntie Lily, it's Lottie from BISTA. Um, you asked voice notes about what we do to clear our heads, um, in terms of mental health, and I just thought I'd share a few of mine. They're probably a little bit cliché. Um, I go for walks, so I get out in nature. I find that really helps.

Speaker E 0:46:21 Um, I will try and focus my brain, whatever activity I'm going to do, um, to help clear my head. I will focus my brain for whatever period of time that is. So if I can carve out 20 minutes to go on a walk, or half an hour or an hour, great. And I'll plan whatever time I've got that day, I'll plan roughly the route or roads I'm going to go down that I know I can achieve in that time. And then I'm sort of achieving something as I go.

Speaker E 0:46:46 Um, same as if I'm in the garden and I know I've got, say, it's to squeeze sort of 45 minutes in the garden, I'll go out there and think, right, what can I actually achieve that's really noticeable in 45 minutes? So a little rough plan in my head, a little mental note, and then I'll sit out and try and do that so that I feel I'm achieving, and then I'm focusing my brain on that. Um, it might also be that I sit down and play guitar or do a bit of songwriting. That'll focus my brain. Might only have 1 hour as well, you know, once a month to do that in between cooking, cleaning, little one school runs, you know, looking after my mum.

Speaker E 0:47:20 Whatever it might be, it's just squeezing in those little tiny pockets of 20 minutes here and of stuff I know I really enjoy. Same as cooking, that will focus me for that period of time, and I'll really enjoy that. And I just find focusing on one thing and achieving something to an end point means that I am achieving and I'm focused, and it allows me more space in my brain to not let those little voices creep in that, that do. Uh, so yeah. Just wanted to share the little bits and bobs I do to try not let the internal monologue take over every now and again.

Speaker E 0:47:58 Um, love to everyone, stay well, and this is Lottie from Bicester. Bye!

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:02 Love Lottie.

Auntie Linnie 0:48:04 Is that Lottie that was on Saturday?

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:06 Sure was.

Auntie Linnie 0:48:07 Lottie that slept in her camper van?

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:09 Yep.

Auntie Linnie 0:48:10 Lottie that slept in a graveyard?

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:12 Did she? Are we allowed to say that?

Auntie Linnie 0:48:17 Well, she's put it on Patreon that she's survived the night.

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:20 Is that Lottie?

Auntie Linnie 0:48:21 I'm sure that was Lottie.

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:22 Unless we've got 2 Lotties.

Auntie Linnie 0:48:23 Oh, we might have a couple of Lotties.

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:24 Who knows? But Lottie, we're gonna do a Patreon episode soon. Oh, okay. 'Cause again, she's just such a lovely human. I think it'll be a great chat into what she does.

Auntie Linnie 0:48:34 But I get what she does. I get what Lottie's saying, albeit my, my, what I do is not necessarily, not saying I don't enjoy it, 'cause I like housework, but, That's my cleanse.

Natalie Cassidy 0:48:45 Completing a task you like doing, don't you?

Auntie Linnie 0:48:48 Yeah, massively. So even if, like, I couldn't have the thought of, say, if I've got a busy weekend and I know I'm barely gonna be at home, I've got to know that I've done something that will just enhance.

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:01 So be it cleaning out the sink drawer or—

Auntie Linnie 0:49:04 Or doing out the sock drawer.

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:06 Or the fridge or—

Auntie Linnie 0:49:07 Or cleaning out the fridge. Yeah. Even though it's just that one job, then I know I've achieved something. Yeah. One less task to tackle.

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:14 I get it.

Auntie Linnie 0:49:15 Do you

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:15 know, I need to go into that.

Auntie Linnie 0:49:17 Yeah. Because I do, for me, that's very therapeutic.

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:20 It's bits, bits, bits, bits.

Auntie Linnie 0:49:21 And I think, don't feel you're getting anywhere. You're chasing something. Yeah. That, well, we, we've said that to you with when you do a room up, haven't we?

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:28 Oh, I can't do it.

Auntie Linnie 0:49:30 Yeah. And I, that is for me, like, yeah, it's, I'm not, but then that's

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:36 the old

Auntie Linnie 0:49:36 self that knows ADHD. Yeah. Maybe I won't start. I won't start, and like Dave wants to now start another job in terms of refurbishing, right? I will not do that until we have completed the drive. I'm waiting for the garage door to go on, the pier caps have to go on.

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:51 No, I get that.

Auntie Linnie 0:49:52 I don't wanna move on to the next job until the first one is complete.

Natalie Cassidy 0:49:55 I do get that.

Auntie Linnie 0:49:55 Even if that holds something back, I just need to know one is completely done, you move on. Which is why I used to say to you, when you do your room, your lounge, make sure you complete it. And you did, bar your light fittings. Do you remember it took you about 2 years to get light fittings?

Natalie Cassidy 0:50:10 And I've got my pictures on the wall. I've got pictures to be framed. Yeah. Because I'm not sure what I want there. But again—

Auntie Linnie 0:50:15 Yeah, but I get, I kind of get that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:50:16 Yeah. But there are certain things that aren't done. My lamp's 15 years old. Yeah. That's gotta go in the bin. I need new lights. So there are bits.

Auntie Linnie 0:50:22 Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:50:23 But yes, in terms of decoration. But—

Auntie Linnie 0:50:25 And so, but again, she's using it as a scenario. I like that. Yeah. That for her, she's achieving something. And that clears her mind.

Natalie Cassidy 0:50:34 No, it's, uh—

Auntie Linnie 0:50:35 You have to find your own technique, your own skill set, your own, your own thing, because we're all different.

Natalie Cassidy 0:50:43 Absolutely.

Auntie Linnie 0:50:43 What might be, you know, for you, it might be more important to sit and read half a book or read a whole book or listen to someone else. It might be listening to a pod. Someone else, it might be going for that walk. But whatever it is that makes you feel better, you've just got to try and incorporate that within your day, within your week.

Natalie Cassidy 0:51:00 And I think sitting here saying, going for a walk, going outside, da, da, da, that's all very well. And again, I'm always thinking of the worst-case scenario. I always think of people, people who have— who are carers. Yeah. Carers, 24-hour carers to people. They can't get out on their own. They don't get a break. That's really difficult. Again, conversation.

Auntie Linnie 0:51:25 Cups of tea. Yeah. And young mums, young mums with babies.

Natalie Cassidy 0:51:30 Get the pram, knackered. Yeah. Geez, like jet lag when you've had a baby. Yeah. Absolute jet lag. If you can't have a baby and everyone's asking you, when are you gonna have a baby? Why haven't you got a baby? Like a stabbing in the heart every time. There's so many different scenarios that we have to face that they're all different. You will find a little bit of comfort in something. And that's what we're trying to say.

Auntie Linnie 0:51:52 That's right, yeah. And that's why it's important to find that bit of comfort. But, you know, and again, it is that, I remember that. I remember the feeling of being at home all day with the children, and it was so hard. It was so hard. And I just remember literally Dave would, I could hear the key go in the door, 'cause he'd have a long day at work. Of course. That key was going in the door, and I'd literally be like, here you go. I'm just gonna go have 20 minutes to myself. And I'd just literally have to just lock myself in the bathroom, just have 20 minutes to myself.

Natalie Cassidy 0:52:22 Yeah, yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:52:22 You know, again, really, I should have been going out. I should have said, I'm going for a walk. You know, I see it with Annalisa. She's got her trainer, or you just got to have that time away.

Natalie Cassidy 0:52:31 Yes.

Auntie Linnie 0:52:33 Outside of the house to know that, no, you, for that 10 minutes or 20.

Natalie Cassidy 0:52:37 You're on your own.

Auntie Linnie 0:52:37 Yeah. No one, you're not responsible for anyone. Just for that half an hour. That's such a pressure, isn't it? Now, whether that's looking after an elderly person.

Natalie Cassidy 0:52:46 Children.

Auntie Linnie 0:52:46 A child. Anyone. Yeah. Whoever. Sibling, brother, whoever. Yeah. Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:52:53 Well, that was a quick hour.

Auntie Linnie 0:52:54 Yeah. Is it really an hour? Yes. It's a huge topic. We haven't got through half the messages we've got.

Natalie Cassidy 0:53:00 Well, we've got through a few. Thank you so much. Um,

Auntie Linnie 0:53:03 we just wanted to acknowledge it because obviously, as you say, Saturday.

Natalie Cassidy 0:53:06 Oh, and it's an important little date in the calendar. Try and have a tea and a talk with someone on Saturday. Maybe pick up the phone to someone you've not spoke to for ages. The other thing I wanted to say is remember, Sometimes we did. I think it was a message we had, so it's not just me saying this, but sometimes it's the people that are always checking in on other people.

Auntie Linnie 0:53:27 Might need checking in on.

Natalie Cassidy 0:53:30 That they might need a little checking in on and a how are you. Yeah. Or if you've not heard from someone for ages and in your head you think, oh, I wonder how they are, just pick the phone up. It's not awkward. Just even a text or a voice note, which is a bit more personable, I feel sometimes. Yeah, just pick it up. Go, I thought of you, how are you doing? I'm massively busy, but I thought of you. It could make someone's day.

Auntie Linnie 0:53:51 I did it Sunday to 2 friends. Yeah, that's good. Did exactly that.

Natalie Cassidy 0:53:54 I'm terrible for it and I'm going to do it. I'm terrible.

Auntie Linnie 0:53:58 It can just be a simple hi, thinking of you. It goes a long way.

Natalie Cassidy 0:54:03 It does.

Auntie Linnie 0:54:03 But what we will definitely be doing, continuing to do these events that we're— well, I like what you hosted on Saturday.

Natalie Cassidy 0:54:12 Absolutely. Getting people together.

Auntie Linnie 0:54:14 Getting people together. For a lot of people, especially people that haven't maybe got a massive circle of friends or female networks, family networks.

Natalie Cassidy 0:54:24 It's also something to look forward to. Yeah. Something to put down in your calendar.

Auntie Linnie 0:54:28 To put in your diary. Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:54:29 You know it's coming.

Auntie Linnie 0:54:30 And it's something you can, you know.

Natalie Cassidy 0:54:32 Yeah. And again, I know these things can be a lot of money. Not everybody's got the money.

Auntie Linnie 0:54:37 You've got plenty of notice. You can save up. for it, can't you? Yeah.

Natalie Cassidy 0:54:41 Or I'm even thinking of, it'd be lovely to do a live Patreon one night where you tell everybody, grab a cup of tea, grab a beer, whatever you want, and we go live. Right. And then we can, people can chat and we are here.

Natalie Cassidy 0:54:54 Yeah. And we can have a chat, even if it's half an hour. Something nice, something free for people on Patreon. I know Patreon's 6, 7 quid or whatever, but it's a couple of coffees a month. It's not a massive, massive issue.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:05 Yeah. You can join Patreon. There's loads of bonus material on there. And again, that community is building. You can see people, what they're doing in the week, people are talking.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:13 That's www.patreon.com/lifewithnat. And remember, I will write all of the numbers I said at the beginning down in case you need somebody who isn't family, isn't friends, and you feel low and you wanna talk to 'em. You're not failing doing that. It's really brave to pick up the phone.

Auntie Linnie 0:55:32 Absolutely.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:32 Really brave. We pick up the phone enough, don't we?

Auntie Linnie 0:55:35 We certainly do.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:36 We don't actually, is it?

Auntie Linnie 0:55:37 Not as much as we used to.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:38 I do love the old phone.

Auntie Linnie 0:55:39 Yeah. We don't do it as much as we used to. But then again, because before I knew, I kind of, your EastEnders, you had a routine.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:46 I did.

Auntie Linnie 0:55:46 So I kind of knew when you were available.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:48 In the morning. Yeah. Yeah.

Auntie Linnie 0:55:49 And we've kind of lost that. But, you know, again—

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:52 And I have to tell you that my routine in the morning has changed. Just to end on a lighter note.

Auntie Linnie 0:55:56 Oh.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:57 They have put fucking roadworks in.

Auntie Linnie 0:55:59 Oh.

Natalie Cassidy 0:55:59 It's just the most ridiculous thing for the school run you've ever seen in your life. It's now taken me 25 minutes longer to get back here for Joanie.

Auntie Linnie 0:56:09 Gosh. Just, and that's a long time in the morning, isn't it? Added to your normal—

Natalie Cassidy 0:56:14 It's a good, it's a good hour and 10, hour and 15.

Auntie Linnie 0:56:16 How long are they gonna be there for?

Natalie Cassidy 0:56:18 Dunno, about 8 weeks, 10 weeks. Nightmare.

Auntie Linnie 0:56:21 That's not great for the old stress levels either, is it?

Natalie Cassidy 0:56:23 No. But I can call you. Yeah, if Joni shuts up, stops talking. Bless her little heart.

Auntie Linnie 0:56:28 She loves a chat.

Natalie Cassidy 0:56:29 She loves a chat. She don't mind talking. Lynn, I will talk to you very, very soon.

Auntie Linnie 0:56:35 You will indeed.

Natalie Cassidy 0:56:35 Thank you everybody. We've got James's little birthday at the weekend. That'll be lovely. Oh, we have. We've got that too. James was 2, obviously it was yesterday. You'll be listening to this, James was 2 Wednesday, so.

Auntie Linnie 0:56:47 And he's got chatty as well. So someone else for us to talk to. I just had a full-on conversation with him on the phone. He's brilliant.

Natalie Cassidy 0:56:53 Bye-bye, darling.

Auntie Linnie 0:56:54 Yes. Hiya, Nana. Ice, ice baby. This is adorable.

Natalie Cassidy 0:57:03 Can't believe he's 2.

Auntie Linnie 0:57:05 I know.

Natalie Cassidy 0:57:05 Right, okay. Speak soon. 07788 20 19 19. If you wanna send any messages, Regarding this subject, do. I can put them in our group. We can do this again in a few weeks or a few months. You know what we're like. It's lovely to, to keep things going, keep things which are important going. So thank you for listening. Follow, subscribe, tell your friends. Have a fantastic weekend, and I'll see you on Monday, or you'll hear me on Monday. Bye, Lynn.

Auntie Linnie 0:57:32 Bye all.

Natalie Cassidy 0:57:33 Bye.

Auntie Linnie 0:57:34 Bye-bye.